corycat Member Profile

...See more TW: suicide is mentioned I've struggled with anxiety since I was a little kid, but started having depressive episodes on top of the anxiety in high school. I'm getting screened for bipolar II this month. I almost never have good days. I left college because I almost took my life about a month ago, and now I'm not sure what's next. I want to go to nursing school, but haven't been accepted/denied yet. I'm not suicidal anymore, but my anxiety has taken its place- especially about all the unceratinty in my life. An example- I have to wait until Monday to know if I got a job I really wanted or not. Another- I don't know where/when I'm going back to college. I'm also on really dangerous new medications. I got perscribed klonopin, and I'm absolutely terrifed of it. No matter what I say to my doctor or parents, they're making me take this drug, and I feel like I'm already set out to be an addict. I get addicted to things easily. I understand medical advice isn't allowed here but it's just on my mind. Just broke up with my boyfriend last night as well and of course am feeling crushed that I broke his heart when it was all because of my MI and I didn't want to put him through that. Is anyone else idle at home due to their condition? How do you deal with not having closure every day? If anyone has anything to say about anything I just mentioned, please please reply. I need help.

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