crimsonScarf9685 Member Profile

...See more I spent so many years being angry and disappointed in my parents- now their aging and it feels like I’ve lost time. I’m currently on a mental health break and depend on my parents support. My relationship with them was always ok, but had been suffering in the last few years. Past trauma (emotional only) had led me to distance myself and now one is sick and I’m so conflicted. I don’t know how to let go of the past. Do I have to suck it up now that we’re in this situation? How could my siblings , who went through the same thing, pick up and just be there? How can they forgive? I’m one of the oldest children but even my older sibling has moved on. Why is it only me? We suck at communicating but when we need each other we’re always there. It’s just me.. it’s been several days since my parent went to the hospital and everyone has visited but me. I hesitate because of my social anxiety but what am I gonna say when I get there? I’m filled with worry and my stomach just doesn’t feel right. How do I let go and forgive? I’m so lost and my feelings are drowning me. I want to be better. How do I start

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