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ginny817
1,330 M Little Steps 4
PathStep 10 Compassion hearts33 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2022 Member sinceAugust 3, 2022
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Should I wait or let go?
Relationship Stress / by ginny817
Last post
 August 4th, 2022
...See more I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years. In the beginning everything was great. We both brought each other peace and were calm. We fell in love after a year of dating and he said it to me a year later exactly when I felt it too. However, he is very hot and cold now. He says stuff like "there's no reason I wouldn't marry you" when things are going well and as soon as we get serious (eg, parents meet) he pulls back and says "we need to talk about if we are compatible cause I sometimes feel we aren't in sync like my friends who got married" It's pretty annoying because I don't know what he wants. I know if he let's go of me, it won't hurt him. He once said "just know If this ends, it's not because you weren't enough". It's so cryptic because it seems like its a pre warning. Is he keeping me around until he finds the next best thing? I asked him that too and he says no but words over actions. Hes been in a 6 year relationship before me and he gave it his all. And ever since, he says he doesn't prioritize relationships which is sad because I put him first all the time. I drive on different roads and keep crying hoping it will get better. And sometimes it does, but then it's the same cycle. He also started his business when he met me and it gets in the way of things. I don't want to throw myself at him and he available all the time but he's barely ever available. I don't like the fact that he spent so much time with his ex and can't with me...but I guess because of his work too or so I make myself believe it's bc of that. I've lost my virginity to him too. He says he is committed to me but I don't think he is. He seems so confused which is strange for a guy that legit plans everything. So what should I do? Is there ways I can resolve this?
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Confused on what to do?
Relationship Stress / by ginny817
Last post
 August 3rd, 2022
...See more I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years. Hes very hot and cold. One day he'll say something like "there's no reason I wouldn't marry you" and then a month later when we get into an argument or it gets more serious (eg, our parents meet), he gets cold feet and says stuff like "im not sure if we are compatible". He also says he's committed but actions say otherwise. He's not willing to get engaged. And I try talking about it but he says he feels pushed even thou I give him so much space and time. I was very clear in the start and told him that I date to marry and that I'm only interested in a serious relationship and I made it clear that I don't want anyone wasting my time. Hes very confusing. He has baggage too since he dated his ex for 7 years and treated her like a queen. And because it didn't work out with her, he prioritizes me after his work and family. And doesn't factor me into decisions. He started his business 2 years ago and it really gets in the way of us meeting but I think if he wanted to, he would. He says cryptic things like "just know if this ends....it's not because you were never enough", "I'm here now" or "I'll marry you tomorrow if that's what this is about" and it just messes with my head because this person is so confused. I sometimes think he's with me but open to new girls and that's the worst feeling in the world. I get so much anxiety from all of this and I've paused everything in my life since he came into it because I always prioritized and he didn't. It hurts like he'll knowing that someone can be be nice for a second and then rude and unsure. I don't like the unclarity. And I feel used. I lost my virginity to him too so it hurts and I'm afraid. Hes also an avoided so he gets mad when I bring serious convos up which is not cool because how else can one resolve issues. What should I do? I still want it to be him.
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