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honestTriangle428
1 101 M Embraced 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts10 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2026 Member sinceSeptember 16, 2026
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Why am I like this?
Depression Support / by honestTriangle428
Last post
 21 hours ago
...See more I hate crying because it's a sign of apparent weakness. That's what my family says, they say it's weakness and that I should never cry, I used to get chastised because when I get angry I cry. Now, most days I cry myself to sleep or cry in the shower so no one sees me. I hate myself. I'm very disrespectful to people. I lie and cheat and I lash out at my family members, I need to understand why I'm doing this? I don't know why I'm angry all the time or why I want to stay indoors all the time, I don't know why I avoid the company of others. Sometimes I just don't want to interact with people and I talk back to my family. I lash out and say mean things instead of working my own feelings out and embarrassing myself in front of people. I realised that I feel terrible because other people see my disrespectfulness and it's embarrassing. It's not coming from a place of wanting to better myself but is more of a self image, which is very narcissistic. And I hate that. I hate that I feel this way, I hate that I'm selfish, impatient and entitled. I have a no-care attitude which I think i have because of the fact that I don't want people to see that it's affecting me because that's a weakness. I'm also bad at apologising and I use people for my own selfish reasons, I'm not a good person. No matter how hard I try I'm stuck in this place forever. I hate myself so much, I get angry easily. I'm spoiled and I think that I'm the smartest person in the room when I'm not, I'm pretending to be smart cause I know deep down I'm not. I hate myself so much.
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I think I have anxiety.
Anxiety Support / by honestTriangle428
Last post
 18 hours ago
...See more I can't sleep at night, I always wake up in the 2 or 3 hours later in a cold sweat. I get stomach aches, diarrhoea and I just find it hard to get back to sleep. My studies and my interactions with my family and friends have been heavily affected. When people yell at me or when I know I did something wrong or feel like it's my fault I feel dizzy and faint. A lot of people, especially my family don't believe in anxiety and just thinks I'm lazy and sometimes I think so to.
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