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imaginativeSquare2503
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PathStep 5 Compassion hearts19 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2016 Member sinceFebruary 29, 2016
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Social anxiety and helpless
Anxiety Support / by imaginativeSquare2503
Last post
 March 9th, 2016
...See more I'm not sure how to write this, but I have to write something. The title says social anxiety, but to be honest Im not sure if I have social anxiety, and I am terrified of going to a doctor or psychologist to get answers. I used to think that I was just more shy and introvert than most people. At high school I had to stop doing presentations after getting a full blackout in front of my class. It is many years ago now and hard to describe, but that was the last time I spoke in front of a crowd. I moved on with things and I am older now. I study at the university. For my first weeks I would go to school, look into the room where we were supposed to sit and study, see all the people sitting there, panick and go straight home again. I kept doing this day after day until I finally got some friends and managed to go to school every now and then, but now its getting worse again. For the last 6 months I have barely attended school, I feel like I am failing all of my classes. Before this I dropped two exams spontaneously on the day, just staring into the wall at home, too afraid to go, and things are only getting worse. I am getting more and more terrified of people. I quit my job two days ago because it is service related, and I would feel horrible for days before going to work. Whenever there was a rush of people coming in I would panick. Now I am mostly just locked up in my room with no family around. I want to seek help, but I am scared, I cant get myself to call to get an appointment. I am scared to go there and hear that nothing is wrong, that I just have to move on with my life and stop being weak. I don't think I can open up to a stranger and have this person place a judgement on me even though this person is a proffesional. Does anyone have any tips on what to do on my own or how to take the step towards getting help? Has anyone been in a similar situation and managed to make it better for themselves? I really need an advice of some sort. I am feeling so lost and helpless.
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