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imsotireddddd
2 403 M Embraced 3
PathStep 9 Compassion hearts29 Forum posts5 Forum upvotes15 Current upvotes15 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2026 Member sinceApril 5, 2022
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grieving a love in a world full of heartless people.

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Insight on anxious - avoidant attachment dynamic
7 Cups Online Therapy / by imsotireddddd
Last post
 December 30th, 2025
...See more Hi, I’m going through a break up and need some help on the dynamic listed above. I’m anxious and he’s an avoidant and we’ve been together for 4 years, he recently discarded me again after we lived together for 4 months.
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Break up after 4 years
Relationship Stress / by imsotireddddd
Last post
 December 22nd, 2025
...See more Synopsis: Basically, our relationship had a lot of unresolved trust issues from the past that we never fully healed from, and over time that made everything feel fragile. I leaned on him a lot emotionally and needed reassurance, while he started to feel drained and responsible for holding everything together. When we argued, it usually turned into defensiveness or panic instead of actually getting resolved, so the same problems kept coming up. We also had different needs — I needed closeness and consistency to feel safe, and he needed space and calm — and that clash created constant tension. On top of that, family and cultural dynamics made him feel like he didn’t fully belong in my world. Eventually the buildup of stress, fear, and emotional exhaustion led to situations that made him feel unsafe in the relationship, and even though there was real love and effort on both sides, he stopped believing the relationship could work. Details: The trust issues: he cheats ON me, I cheated WITH him on my previous ex. My previous ex was abusive and cheated first which doesn’t justify cheating but nobody’s perfect. His logic is since I can cheat on my abusive ex, I can cheat on him too. I never cheated on him but he cheated on me twice. So there’s that, that was the foundation of our relationship, no wonder it crashed right? I guess. We started living together 4 months ago, and after each argument, he decided that he was done, but made it seem like we were working on things only for him to go sign a lease with his co workers and broke ours. So now i’m back at my parents house, had to quit my job, and no idea what to do. My nervous system is still in shock, and this dynamic feels addictive because I’m anxiously attached and he is a dismissive avoidant. Any advice on how to move forward without having hopes of him returning?
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