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jgolfergirl17
1 496 M Embraced 4
PathStep 6 Compassion hearts53 Forum posts25 Forum upvotes32 Current upvotes32 Age GroupTeen Last activeMay, 2026 Member sinceMay 16, 2026
Bio

I'm 17, abused and living alone since I was 15, when my father abandoned me with exception of his check- INS. I enjoy sports. I'm a golfer. I like to have fun and I love to laugh. I like trying to help ppl feel better, and I love to make people smile :)

Recent forum posts
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Hug?
Trauma Support / by jgolfergirl17
Last post
 May 21st
...See more Hi I'm 17, and autistic, I ran away for a couple days after I got hit and my hair pulled down the stairs recently at home and my coach is angry with me says I keep doing this cycle of running away and it's dangerous. He yelled at me😭 He says I'm making bad decisions. He's not happy with me right now😭 I've tried to talk to therapists but they just tell me to breathe and stuff and nothing helps the PTSD except to run away, he wants me to get more professional help but it nvr helps me. Grounding myself with like touch and smell and having a safe place, none of that helps me feel better😭😭💔 I want my parents to be good parents but they won't! My coach said nothing will change until I tell the police what's going on but if I tell my parents/fam say they are going to have all the ppl I care about hurt, so I can't tell. He understands that choice but doesn't like it🥹 I protect my parents and say I'm safe at home, nothing is wrong, every time a police report happens. I need a 🤗 HUG please🥹💔 I'm scared here in my house alone and I can't sleep again, and I feel distressed and just very very SAD
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I am so sad 😭 I feel so unloved
Depression Support / by jgolfergirl17
Last post
 May 20th
...See more I'm 17 and can't sleep my parents abused me daily and abandoned me. I'm living alone in one of their houses. They just up and left when I was 15. I feel so unloved they come by just to hurt me and take out their anger on me after they check on the house like if your parents hate you this much how can anyone ever want to be my friend or love me or want me around. No one ever will because something must be wrong with me because my parents hated me and never ever wanted me. 💔😭😢 Today my dad sent some man to the house to pull my hair and pull me down the stairs and hit me then pulled and shook my head so much I had a vertigo head ache all day and a stained neck muscle Why can't I just have a normal high school life😢
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😨 Scared
Anxiety Support / by jgolfergirl17
Last post
 May 21st
...See more I can't sleep being home alone It's so scary in this house w out good parents or a family I just feel like my dad's going to come in again and beat me and drag me out of bed and hurt me again in the middle of the night to take out his anger I liked it bttr B4 he abandoned things and left at least I knew when he was angry and knew it was coming now I never kno it's whenever And I can never sleep at night😫
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Can't function in life
Trauma Support / by jgolfergirl17
Last post
 May 21st
...See more I'm 17. I come from a family in NY that doesn't work doing good things, if you know what I mean. Through my years I've been beaten, burned, locked in closets, locked in crawl spaces, no food and water, yelled at and cursed at, staged kidnapping by my father where he would pay his guys to take me in the middle of the night to some far away warehouse and punish and hurt and torture me for days until he calmed down. In between all this my mom had cancer and was sick and was afraid of my father so just did mostly what he said and couldn't protect me much. I have always done sports to meet coaches to help me like parent me and give me the attention I want. I used sports for that. I still do. Now I golf. My father leaves me home alone for months at a time still hurting me just not as much. I am autistic, have PTSD, and probably more stuff wrong but what my real problem is now is that I have only one adult in my life, my golf coach. And I have a thousand problems everyday. He is overwhelmed and does his best but we keep fighting. I am in this cycle where if he doesn't give me enough attention and stuff I run away and then he and I argue and fight and he yells and says he will be done with me if I keep on doing it, but I feel like I just react and can't stop. Tried therapy, doesn't help they tell me to breathe or go to the gym but my pain is so so so so so so much stronger then that I just can't function everyday. Since abused my dad never really put me in school I just home schooled with my own IEP program which he stopped this year, where I should be a junior in high school. I just have one friend and my coach. I'm scared all the time, can't relate to kids my age because I think I'm younger emotionally I'm told, and I feel like I want my coach to be my parent but he won't, he says there is boundaries. And that hurts me everyday because he loves me as a friend and athlete but won't take me in. Nobody will. Nobody has ever wanted me. This is the first adult who had loved me and I'm messing everything up because I want not them he can give and he just can't do more. I feel lonely and isolated and like I need direction from a parent and just I'm really struggling 💔
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