Hug?

Hi I'm 17, and autistic, I ran away for a couple days after I got hit and my hair pulled down the stairs recently at home and my coach is angry with me says I keep doing this cycle of running away and it's dangerous. He yelled at me😭

He says I'm making bad decisions. He's not happy with me right now😭 I've tried to talk to therapists but they just tell me to breathe and stuff and nothing helps the PTSD except to run away, he wants me to get more professional help but it nvr helps me. Grounding myself with like touch and smell and having a safe place, none of that helps me feel better😭😭💔 I want my parents to be good parents but they won't!

My coach said nothing will change until I tell the police what's going on

but if I tell my parents/fam say they are going to have all the ppl I care about hurt,

so I can't tell. He understands that choice but doesn't like it🥹

I protect my parents and say I'm safe at home, nothing is wrong, every time a police report happens.

I need a 🤗 HUG please🥹💔

I'm scared here in my house alone and I can't sleep again, and I feel distressed and just very very SAD