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limegreenMoon1147
118 M Embraced 1
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts12 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2022 Member sinceAugust 5, 2022
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Trusting people, relationships, opening up
35 & Over Community / by limegreenMoon1147
Last post
 August 5th, 2022
...See more Hello everyone readingI am new here. I was diagnosed Bipolar (type not specified) about 15 years ago but i chose to ignore the diagnosis and to be treated for depression as i thought it was less embarrassing. I have moved to live to a different country 7 years ago. Had my family and a great job. 3 years ago I got manic out of nowhere as i thought. I do understand now that at that time i was working 15 hrs per day 6-7 days per week, not sleeping much and graduating from 2 colleges on adition to bachelors I already had.What happened was I started to believe that i was watched by some religious cult which was trying to get me in. I was never religious and grew up in non religious family. I believed that i somehow put my child at risk and that we were ment to be killed. To cut the story short, ended up with psichiatrist diagnosing Bipolar 1. Then i was put on mood stabilizers ( not sure if i can name them) plus antipsychotics plus antidepressants. I am an educator so i believed it my duty to be open about my diagnosis to help end the stigma.Little did I know. Once i was told that people like me should be locked out. But tbh that wasn't the worst discrimination i have experienced.Once i told my management that i have Bipolar, i was put onto a 'caring' mode. I started to receive less tasks, i was asked if 4 hours per day answering the phone (i worked in one of the biggest hospitals in a capital city) would be a 'better' option for me etc. And that's all after i worked on a project that won a tender worth millions of euros for 2 years. I had another breakdown with voice loss for 2 months. So i left that job...I have moved back to my home country 2 months ago. New psychiatrist resulted in new medication cocktail, dose adjustment etc. which ended up with another mania and psychosis. I am receiving antipsychotics for 7 days now.What i found the most difficult os connecting to people. Do I tell? I do receive joking comments as omg you are so weird/strange etc. Do i explain myself? I have isolated myself a lot recently. Moving countries has contributed to that as well. I am in the position of building new relationships, meeting new people which i FEAR now. If anyone has any similar experience please share.Thank you loads in advance
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Connecting people/psychosis/ Bipolar 1
Bipolar, Schizophrenia & Psychosis Support / by limegreenMoon1147
Last post
 August 5th, 2022
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