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lostsoul2007
1 949 M Little Steps 1
PathStep 16 Compassion hearts26 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes5 Current upvotes5 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2026 Member sinceJuly 7, 2024
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Lost in the darkness of my soul

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Does it ever stop?
Depression Support / by lostsoul2007
Last post
 September 3rd
...See more Does it ever stop from begging for the love that you’re supposed to have for being born? Does it ever stop the constant need to be reminded that I’m not anyone’s person and that no matter how hard I try there’s no way someone will pick me to be a friend of them Pain will consume everything you love or cherished in your life but will it ever stop? Do I have to become more of a shell of the person that I used to be to prove that this isn’t me and that this isn’t normal to deserve the actual support that I need? Can’t they just see what happened to me? Do they not feel it? You know what happened You saw what happened *** you were the reason why it happened And you still refuse to see me for who I am The emptiness will swallow me eventually This darkness that I’m living in will be my home forever And then you’ll be looking back and say Yeah… I really begged for love but that’s my why Until the thoughts return And you’re left with the lost case of a kid you are Never enough and never loved The lost case kid with what used to be the energetic one Till you dulled my life when I was 6 A six year old kid had to choose between his parents because both of them went on a challenge onto who’s word goes around Left alone in a damp bed every night because fear was my closest friend that no body knew about Too scared that they will make me alone again Until fear is gone and you’re left with the same emptiness I don’t have anyone to talk to about And if I do they just want to leave Just want to run from the topic because it was too intense for them to handle No one cares about their depressed friends until they do something that require their attention And even so Most cases are not met with their expectations It pushes someone to the far corner of their darkness and they’re forced to handle the pain again Some don’t survive the pain Some would handle it because the thought of feeling the things they have inside is so overwhelming that they choose pain over it One day everyone is gonna understand Everyone will know how bad it was I pray for it not to be my last Because God i really want to see the look on your face mom when I tell you the whole story and how I felt
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Trying
Addiction Support / by lostsoul2007
Last post
 June 30th
...See more People’s emotions are getting to me again and that suffocating restlessness is so back that I had a new relapse I was two weeks free this time It felt good but the mood thing and the increasing sounds ringing along with anything surrounding me is making me feel extra sensitive Today was supposed to be my first hang out while being free but… yeah it happened *** i can’t set boundaries nor handle emotions anymore Before you tell someone about how bad things are going Just try checking if they actually can handle listening to how intense your emotions are Maybe some ppl out there are like me It feels like I’m being pulled back to the black hole I was pulled out from And that timer count sound in my head is ringing louder by the days
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Do you ever just…
Depression Support / by lostsoul2007
Last post
 July 7th
...See more Do you ever just feel like you’re not living your life And that your life is just passing by and you’re still stuck in the same place You don’t know what’s coming next and the idea of thinking about it scares you to the point you would rather actually get up from bed than thinking about it Being constantly drained and judged for being tired and feeling lifeless even from close loved ones is so EXHAUSTING The loneliness will never escape me ***…
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