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neonBranch1080
1 109 M Embraced 1
PathStep 6 Compassion hearts9 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeJune, 2025 Member sinceMay 26, 2025
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Fear to eat fully coz I grew up poor
Eating Disorder Support / by neonBranch1080
Last post
 June 8th, 2025
...See more Most of my childhood and adolescence I grew up with single mother whos been always saying things like "we need to save money" and "don't waste anything" and so. I was always really tall but skinny and until a year ago I thought that's just how I am. And then I started to work in a new company with really nice guys from country side. After few months I felt so relaxed around them and also after few village parties with tons of homemade farm food that I actually started to eat a lot and gained so much weight and so much muscles. And when I went home I switched back to eating small portions and actually noticed that I feel guilty about wanting more food. And that's how it is till today. When I'm buying my food I finally eat like a king, huge portions and I really started to love food. But when I am eating at my mothers home or in home of someone from family or someone I don't know well I'm just very tense and cannot even ask for refill even when I'm asked if I'm ok and if I had enough. Do someone has similar experience or some advice how to be relaxed and allow myself to eat on the visits?
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