Fear to eat fully coz I grew up poor
Most of my childhood and adolescence I grew up with single mother whos been always saying things like "we need to save money" and "don't waste anything" and so. I was always really tall but skinny and until a year ago I thought that's just how I am.
And then I started to work in a new company with really nice guys from country side. After few months I felt so relaxed around them and also after few village parties with tons of homemade farm food that I actually started to eat a lot and gained so much weight and so much muscles. And when I went home I switched back to eating small portions and actually noticed that I feel guilty about wanting more food. And that's how it is till today. When I'm buying my food I finally eat like a king, huge portions and I really started to love food. But when I am eating at my mothers home or in home of someone from family or someone I don't know well I'm just very tense and cannot even ask for refill even when I'm asked if I'm ok and if I had enough.
Do someone has similar experience or some advice how to be relaxed and allow myself to eat on the visits?
@neonBranch1080
I think a lot has to do with the current circumstances of where you're eating. If food is still very limited in your family, it makes sense to not more than you need. If times have changed and your family is eating well, is there still a reason that you feel you shouldn't when you're around them?
My situation is quite the opposite. I gain weight easily, so I tend to eat lighter than those around me. I've been doing it for so many years that I don't feel that I'm missing anything. My family situation was opposite too. My mom expected me to eat an adult size portion, even as a small child. I was forced to stay at the table and stuff myself till my plate was empty. Sadly, I became an "emotional eater," and was overweight throughout my childhood and half my adult life.
I think if limiting meal size is still part of your family's habit, it might be better to wait till you're away from them to supplement your intake.
It sounds like when you're in other social situations, you're okay with eating a satisfying amount. That's good. If you're living with your family and they're still limiting intake, is there a possibility that you can go out every now and then and buy a satisfying meal?
That's the thing, the situation changed and I think everybody's all right now but I have this block to even ask coz it seems crazy inappropriate to ask such a question basically about money and being able to afford food for visits and family, at least in my culture. I think if I ask they would lie anyway.
I can always eat elsewhere but I'd like to break this so I can be relaxed with my own family.
Thanks for the answers though, it helped to clear it a bit in my head.
