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nuufka
533 M Embraced 4
PathStep 58 Compassion hearts15 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2017 Member sinceSeptember 13, 2015
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My dad is violent and my family want's me to forget it.
Trauma Support / by nuufka
Last post
 September 14th, 2015
...See more Hi, I'm Viivi and I'm 14 years old. So my dad has been hitting me since I was a child, and luckily he has stopped doing it for now. I know he had some stress for a long time at his workplace, so it could have been partly a reason why he was so violent. I have had depression since I was 11, and my dad was a major reason why I started cutting and I became suicidal. He always became violent when he was mad or just simply pissed off. He never hit my mom or my big brother, just me. Since I was little, I always preferred my mother more than my dad, and I never obeyed him, I hated him so so so much, I rarely even talked to him, only if my mom forced me to. For an example, it was mid day, a weekend, and he suddenly decides I need a shower, I said no (I always showered in the evening, and I was going out back then), and then he became pissed, marched in to my room, dragged me to the shower, tried to catch me when I ran away, and when he caught me, he showered me with my clothes on, he had broken my nose, and I had bruises everywhere because of that 'incident'. And my mom is mad at me because I won't just ''let it go'', talk to him and love him as my father. She drags this topic up almost every day, and is always mad with me because I wont listen to her. The whole family has been in therapy, trying to fix my and my dad's bond, but like hell that would work. How could I make my mother turn to my side, and realize that I cannot stand that man close to me, and that 'bond' cannot be fixed? Like she literally punishes me weekly because of this, was it taking my computer away or something else. And also do anyone of you know any solution for me so I could avoid him as much as possible? Just the constant fear I have to live in, I can't stand it anymore.. And I have been thinking about moving away to study when I'm 16, but my mom won't let me. :L
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