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pippisdaddy
1 80 M Embraced
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts7 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2021 Member sinceApril 16, 2021
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All I wanted was to talk
50 & Over Community / by pippisdaddy
Last post
 May 16th, 2021
...See more I think alot about marriage. I just hope my wife is happy. She's sure earned it. But....im quite she she isn't happy. Let's see. First, a little about me. Diagnosed BP1. Diagnosed disabled. Former alcoholic. Been seeing a shrink for about 8 years. To the problem.. I think alot about marriage. I haven't been a good husband. Not one bit. "cheated" numerous times. She's forgiven the ones she knows about. I suffer from paranoia. I say "cheated". Because there was never insertion. I just feel like she deserves so much more. I'm a bad provider. Very bad. Married 21 years. Lived with in-laws for most of the marriage. And they do NOT like me at all. Bad stuff. Had a fight a few years ago. Wife said if it wasn't for the kids she'd leave. Guess I can't blame her. No sex life at all. She used to be insatiable. Now....we simply don't. Sorry for the length .
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A life of pain
50 & Over Community / by pippisdaddy
Last post
 April 28th, 2021
...See more I've been living life governed by a 36 year old grudge. Yea.... 36. Still remember the day. Walking home from school. My father met me at the crosswalk. " your grandmas dead". Just like that. In one sweeping stroke, the person that I loved most was taken from me. I wasn't even allowed to see her in the hospital. Im BP1. Runs in my family. I think my dad and grandma were. Just never diagnosed. Been seeing a shrink a few years. Lost soany years to alcohol. And just not knowing how to be happy. I guess the way I was told mu grandma died destroyed my coping mechanisms. Ive bounced from bad decision to worse decision throughout life. incapable of holding down a job. I bounce. In relationships, I tend to keep myself sheltered and push away from happiness. I mean...I've been married 21 years to a wonderful woman. 4 great kids. And I feel like I've let them all down. I don't know why I'm not happy. I sure as hell should be. 36 year old grudge.....enough
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