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quietMoon1996
3 166 M Embraced 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts13 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes5 Current upvotes5 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2025 Member sinceAugust 21, 2025
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I lost my cat
Grief & Loss / by quietMoon1996
Last post
 September 23rd, 2025
...See more Two weeks ago I lost my sweet baby boy, Arlo. He was a sweet orange cat and his death was out of nowhere. He was only 5 years old so it was really quite unexpected. I feel as if I haven’t really processed everything. I did cry when my wife and I found him and I cried that entire day, and then a few times since. I have another cat who has since become quite depressed and due to this, my wife and I are looking at getting another cat. I wouldn’t mind another cat, because it just hasn’t been as hectic without two cats. However, I am afraid that once we do get another cat, I am just going to lose it. Arlo was my very first pet since I left the roof of my parents’ house. He was my rebound when I broke up with someone who I still to this day, have deep feelings for even though I am married. (Please do not get me wrong. If I had to choose between my wife and the other person, I would choose my wife). But I feel as if I lost more than my baby boy, but a piece of my life. And what’s worse, is my wife thinks I blame her. I do not blame her in the slightest. I know his death more than likely could not have been prevented. I just don’t know what to do. I don’t want my other cat to be so sad, I don’t want my wife to be sad, and I do want another cat, I just feel like i am replacing Arlo and the reality of him being gone will really hit once another cat is in my life. I feel like this will lead to a spiral of depression and me rejecting this new cat. I don’t know what to do.
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Can’t Pull Myself Out
Depression Support / by quietMoon1996
Last post
 August 22nd, 2025
...See more I have been depressed for most of my life. It’s something that I have dealt with since I was I a teenager (now 28). It’s something I manage with meds, self awareness and coping skills. But currently I am falling deeper into a depression that is causing passive but serious thoughts. I don’t actively want these thoughts but I can’t control them. Usually I am able to pull myself out of this state, but I right now I feel like I can’t. Ive had some major changes in my life recently, and though they aren’t bad changes, it’s been a lot of stress on me. I am married to my wife B and she got into grad school. We recently moved from Nebraska to Illinois for this. It started out as a great change. I’m comfortable where we’re at as it’s not much different from where we were in Nebraska but it’s still the first time I’ve ever lived outside of Nebraska. So stressor one. Stressor two. I am not the sole provider of our household while she goes through school and I don’t make a whole lot for one person, let alone for two. So financially, we are managing based off loans and about $2000 of paycheck a month. Stressor three. Moving here, socially has been a lot. The only person I talk to in person is my wife for the most part. We’re in a grad school town, so everyone is a student and no one has time for extra curricular activities. I’ve met some of B’s classmates and I find myself in much brighter spirits when I am around other people and can hold an in person conversation. I’ve tried the bumble friends app but it hasn’t really panned out well. Stressor four. My job. I recently got a promotion that I start next week. This will help a bit with the money issues but even though good, this change is still new and uncertain. On top of that, where I work has been in the news a lot lately and it’s been very stressful for me to like my job and answer the question “where do you work?” I do like my job and the people I work with but with outside factors it’s really hard to like it, especially when I am experiencing the same issues as to why this place has been in the news. I just really needed to get all these out and ask what can I do to help reduce the stress, to get my depression back under control and to quiet these thoughts I really don’t want to have or do.
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