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sunnyPear5890
1 108 M Embraced 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts13 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes5 Current upvotes5 Age GroupAdult Last activeOctober, 2025 Member sinceSeptember 14, 2025
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Trying to think positively despite knowing my relationship is being tested soon
Relationship Stress / by sunnyPear5890
Last post
 October 2nd, 2025
...See more I'm in a long distance relationship of 8 years now (26F/28M). We started really young , just as I finished high school and he's been waiting for me since then to start our lives together. He waited for me as I finished college and waited for me to get a job. We have visited each other too but my partner has BPD. He expects me to fill his chronic emptiness which I haven't been doing for 2 years now. Now he has reached a breaking point because he's been handling his emotional distress alone and has stopped going to therapy for 2 years now. We are trying to see if the relationship still has potential since this time I will visit him for 3 months. He says he has fairly high hopes. But what he told me he would do if it doesn't work out is what scares me everyday. I know he's just being honest and he's so depressed. But he said he doesn't want to be in a relationship where he doesn't feel crazy compatible. Yes, I was the most stable for him and haven't had triggered him but his emptiness continues to grow. But if this visit doesn't work, if he doesn't feel as attached as before, he will just give up on life. He will just do drugs and die. And it breaks my heart that he would so easily give up and this weight on me so *** huge. I do not want to be his savior, we all know he can only save himself, I just want him as my partner. I am so scared. I am trying to act okay with this knowledge and that everything will turn out okay but I am so afraid it won't. I am getting therapy for this. I know it's not healthy but I just want m partner to be okay and be happy. 
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pwBPD says he loves me but is attracted to someone else
Relationship Stress / by sunnyPear5890
Last post
 September 15th, 2025
...See more Hi everyone. My pwBPD and I are currently on a limited contact break. We are long distance and have been together for about 8 years. It was never a perfect relationship since it started when I was 18 and didn’t know what BPD was.  About 2 weeks ago, I found out that he was talking to his ex (who he dated for 1 month like 9 years ago) and while he was trying to befriend her, had a psychotic break since he was stressed about wondering if our relationship was correct, wondering if there was someone better out there, and trying to maintain a friendly boundary with this ex which was hard. He broke up with me that day and then wanted to get back with me the next day. However, he mentioned that he always feels empty with me. That his ex makes him not feel empty. That he has felt this way for two years now and he doesn’t know what to do. He claims he still loves me but prioritizes his ex over me. He doesn’t know if our relationship will work since he needs to feel that spark again. He hasn’t felt it in 2 years. I will admit that 2 years ago I started my full time job and I was slowly giving up on us. But in the last few months, I was looking forward to our relationship again so the break up shocked me. Now we are on a break since I can’t stop being jealous about the ex he says she is only his friend. Yet he continues to want to spend more time with her than me just because she makes him feel good. I’m not sure what to do anymore. I feel like I am losing my mind. He keeps telling me he loves me and that we have potential but he just needs to feel that spark again. I’m scared I cannot. 
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