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sunnySummer6030
58 M Embraced
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts5 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2021 Member sinceAugust 27, 2021
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Ok so this is me?! 1st Anxiety attack but it was a long time coming
Anxiety Support / by sunnySummer6030
Last post
 September 26th, 2021
...See more Found out I have anxiety yesterday I had an anxiety attack in the middle of nothing happening. I thought I was having a heart attack! I was freaking out inside I was soo scared! I called for my mon to come help me(she stays with us). I called her three times she finally came. I couldn’t stop shaking my arm went numb my face went numb my leg went numb my whole right side. I started to slur my words and then they wouldn’t come out and then I couldn’t think straight. Dizzy dizzy lightheaded sit down on the step try to talk again drool came out. And jumbled slurred words. Don’t panic don’t panic don’t panic look it up it’s not a heart attack on is it? How? I’m young I’m in shape I’m healthy I work out daily I eat good I’m a personal trainer. Help,…mom! … Mom!…. MOM!…what? I,…think,…I,…need,…to… go to …the… hospital(slurred but it came out) (I’m not having a heart attack I wouldn’t be able to talk!) what can you walk are you ok? Umm …idk …I…don’t… thinkso ok wel go out the side door let’s get to the car! mom ran back in to tell my oldest son to watch his brothers so she can bring me to the hospital don’t panic it’s ok everything is ok you can talk better now it’s going away my arms stiffened up why is it stiffened up now? My head feels weird my mom comes out gets in pulls i out and starts blazing to the hospital runs a red light.. mom you don’t need to run any lights it’s ok everything is going to be ok calm down we’re going to get there. I know but it’s taking too long we need to get you there. my question is why am I almost certain I’m dying and I’m trying to calm people down and not myself I didn’t want to go anywhere I didn’t want to do anything I wanted to sleep after it was all said and done and instead of saying no to the date I had planned with my bf I didn’t want him To feel bad so I went tired as all hell and he didn’t even notice! What is wrong with me why do I not try to stop myself from being stressed out for other people? I’m losing myself trying to be the person who stays normal for others I can’t do it anymore I know what I’m doing I see it now but I can’t stop myself? I’m so sad all the time I’m so unmotivated I’m so excited to start something and it takes too long(more than 5 minutes and I can’t sit still I have to move do something else come back later I have to do something for someone else so I don’t think of what I’m supposed to do? I’m all over the place and I hate it I can’t even help myself because my thoughts are everywhere! I’m so sorry to everyone and myself I hate it!!!
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