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sunshine1978
108 M Embraced 1
PathStep 12 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeJune, 2021 Member sinceMay 28, 2021
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Childhood trauma and chronic illness
Trauma Support / by sunshine1978
Last post
 February 14th, 2022
...See more Hello, I am new to 7 cups. I was recommended this app through my chronic complex diseases program. Something I have been struggling with a lot is my childhood trauma. I never really realized what a toll my childhood experiences took on my health until now...I am 42. I was recently told by my rheumatologist that the things I experienced in childhood most likely were the cause of ME/CFS and Fibromyalgia. My parents relationship was very rocky. My father was a drug addict/alcoholic and very violent with my Mother. We were often kicked out of our home by my Dad in the middle of the night. We also seemed to move homes every 6 months for whatever reason. I was put in a lot of situations where I was sexually abused by older children in homes we would be staying. Then at the age of 11 my mother finally found the courage to leave my Dad which was a good thing but it happened in the same month that my grandfather died and me contracting Epstein Barr. I also witnessed a man fall from a 4 story house to his death...pretty much right in front of me as I walked home from school. None of these things that I speak of ever got dealt with or even spoken about. Then a year later a 21 year old man (who was my cousins good friend) gave me so much vodka to the point were I was almost unconscious sexually assaulted me...also...nothing was ever done. I didn’t know that by holding in trauma like that could create terrible health issues. I have suffered every single day with pain and exhaustion etc etc. I try to be a good person and lead a good life and not dwell on things but I’m finding now that all of this stuff is being pushed to the surface and I literally don’t know what to do with it. What fixes childhood trauma? I also feel like these experiences have created problems in my marriage. The sexual abuse causes problems with my sex life. I also struggle with attention from males. It’s like, if a male gives me attention I have a hard time not wanting to cheat or become attached. I’m not really sure what I’m expecting to gain from telling my story here. I wish there was a magic button that could take it all away. I have done four months of EMDR therapy in the past which helped a little bit but maybe I need more extensive therapy and for a longer amount of time?
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