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sympatheticAcres4092
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PathStep 11 Compassion hearts13 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2023 Member sinceOctober 18, 2022
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Trying to get away from friends feels painful
Friendship Support / by sympatheticAcres4092
Last post
 October 21st, 2022
...See more Alright so, I published this in another category, sorry im new, crying and trying my best :( Anyway, so i have these friends since a long long time ago, we went to school together and Graduated high school together, we remained friends in college even if we are in diferent ones. Thing is, I did something, I got drunk for the first time, like black out literally, even thought they took care of me and I appreciate that, they got mad and distant for a few days, and since then they have being distant and I have felt excluded. I love this people, they have being my friends for so long, i even got to consider their families as my second and third family. but now? I feel like they don't even consider me a friend anymore, they make plans without me, I don't even get invited to parties, hangouts, breakfast, sleepover and so on. And when I do is because one needs and alibi and the other can't be there. I'm not even supposed to call them friends right? Or am I the bad one? The thing is when I do get invited even if it's because I was the last option, I get happy, I have a great time, but that day of happiness turns into a week or two of anxiety, loneliness, depression and loads of tears. All of this makes me wonder what is wrong with me, am I being the bad friend? Even though I've being there for them always, even though I have make sure they know they can count on me, I even doubt myself as a human being in general, is there something wrong I need to fix in order to have a friendship? I don't know I feel like I should just get away from them, it's messing with my head and heart, but just thinking about it feels hard and sad, makes me wonder what that loneliness is going to do with me even though I feel lonely right now. How do you end a friendship of so many years without loosing yourself and heart? And mostly how do you move on after that? If that friendship was all you know. So sorry for the long text but thank u for reading it
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Longtime friends
Relationship Stress / by sympatheticAcres4092
Last post
 October 20th, 2022
...See more Soo, this is hard, never done this but yeah, here it goes.. I have this friends, from long time ago, met them since I was a child literally. We were together through school until we graduated, and continued being friends even being each one at a different college. Just for a little context. But how do you take the decision, or gather the courage to make yourself get away from them? Stop trying to believe they are your true friends anymore? I mean, it's so hard since they were my only friends for so long and their families felt like a second and third one to me. But they aren't anymore, they started leaving me behind, like the plans didn't include me, gatherings didn't, parties didn't, sleepover didn't and they just took it so lightly and I'm left here, trying to figure out if there is something lacking on me, as a human being, as a friend and sometimes as a daughter when things start to fall apart at home too. And when I get invited to something is because one of them couldn't make it, and I just became an alibi for one of them, is there something wrong to feel happy for getting so little attention from them? To finally feel included even if it's just for one day and then, in the next 20 plans I'm not included and the pattern just goes on and on. That day of happiness and laughs turn into a week or two of anxiety, loneliness and depression. Realizing once again I'm not consider a true friend just a second if not last option. I want to think I deserve better, I think I need to cut ties with these people I don't even recognize but it's so hard, to even think what more loneliness can make to myself. The fact that I am going to loose people I still love with all my heart, it breaks me. The fact that I'm here crying so hard alone for a future grief of our friendship and they still have each other and probably don't give a damn about my friendship with them breaking down. It's hard, and I don't know how to do it, I feel like I'm getting more and more depressed and it gets worse at night. I don't feel enough, am I being the bad friend? Or I'm I right and they are? How do I make the decision to get away for real? Loosing something so big, that means so much to me.
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