My value and mind can never be understood by people around me, including parents
I am willing to explore and understand the diverse society, to enjoy various beauties of the world. However, seems that diversity and colorfulness is nowadays despised in the society, at least among the people around me. I remember that once upon a time, when I am working in office, some people is chatting about ways of life of people in the world, and one colleague shout that “Every religion is evil”, “Christian, Islam, etc, are all nothing but ***”. I thought that his narrow minded ideology will be criticized but the fact was that majority of people in the office were supporting his view and encouraging him and helping him to strengthen his racist ideologies. And my parents are not so extreme, but when I talked about this to them they said “It is none of your business to care about the people outside your own nation”. It is just like no one can support my wish to embrace a diverse and colorful world. I think the world is nice and we can enjoy freedom ONLY IF the society is inclusive. There are 8 billion people in the world, if every one live in same way, speak only 1 language, isn’t it too boring? My value on diversity seems not to have any understanding and support from surrounding.
For gender convention issue as well. Just several weeks ago, in the building of our company I as well as some of my colleagues saw a man with tail. Then, after he left the elevator, the colleagues began to use derogatory terms on him such as “sissy”, “***”. I just felt so sad that the people around me do not have a single sense of tolerance on social gender diversity which has been understood by hordes of sociologists. I have read a book recently called “Gender knots” which has clearly described the harm patriarchy system is bringing onto both men and women and that such binary gender convention is restricting the freedom of both genders and I can feel as man that such gender stereotypes is harming me in variety of aspects. I really hope that the diversity can be understood by society and support, but the fact is that I am totally isolated when surrounded by so many narrow-minded people who attack the people who has some discrepancy from them. The reason why I am so sad is that if the understanding and acceptance of diversity can not be promoted in the society then I can be victim as long as I have some discrepancy from others, and I won’t have freedom to be myself.
Actually I can understand why my value and mind can not be understood by people around me because lots of people are unwilling to read some books about social science because they are interested in some other activities, and they prefer medias which always cater to social convention so as to get more popularity. As we know, I do not have any right to lecture others with my ideology. But how do I protect myself from being brainwashed by them? And how do I find people supporting me and make a driving force to improve the society which will bring benefit to all of us?
@Iven
My second thought about reading your message was: are we talking about a guy with a pony tail haircut, or about you? And: is it about you demanding to be properly appreciated (what may discourage some people), or about you being afraid of judged, or - in particular - misjudged, as "not conforming to the _norm_"?
I understand your colleagues judging someone by his appearances might have felt unsafe and disturbing to you. But isn't judging all people as "narrow-minded" a bit too judgemental, too?
I think diversity and tolerance are great things. But the other side of the coin is every human's right to have his or her own values, limitations and preferences. And it's about the basic rights of a person.
For example, suppose I am lost in a strange town and need to ask some locals for advice. I have a choice between a guy with a pony tail or a guy with long hair in a leather jacket. African or Spanish. European or American. A little lady with glasses or a big bald man with tattoos. If someone ordered me whom I should choose, looking down on me - that, I believe, would be breaking my basic human rights.
Some social engineering might be nice, but didn't some guys "knowing better how the world SHOULD look like" cause some of the worst disasters, like World War II and Holocaust, to not mention dozens of "small", "regional" bloodsheds on mass scale...
On the other hand, there was a movie "12 Angry Men", about only one man of a dozen being right, while 11 of 12 initially being wrong.
The bottom line is: I think the matter of diversity and conformity vs human rights and freedom is far too complex to be solved in one day (and by a single person).
But you can still be better and happier person every day. And this can result in a "butterfly effect".
Hmmmm, kinda true. So that’s a paradox question: we should accept the diversity, but should such “tolerance” be applied on “intolerance” as well? Hard to answer this question actually, I feel.
Actually just as I said, on my side, you are right. I do not have the right to lecture others. I read books but other people do not have obligation to read the books I like. Most of people, including my parents, are maybe unwilling to have deep thinking about the social issues and they prefer an easier way to live in society: just follow the majority because this is path of least resistance.
But at the same time, you know such loneliness I am feeling as it is hard for me to find people supporting me and most people around me are against me, or against my view….well I can not blame them, so shall I hate myself? Actually I don’t think I am wrong. I would like to be myself and I need friends for conversation and a sense of security.
I really appreciate the people who are able to write books to challenge the social norm, to speak out for injustice and issues. I know an American historian wrote a book “lies teacher has told me: Everything American history textbook got wrong”. I admire him as he has such courage to speak out the truth, the dark history of USA that lots of Americans do not know. Of course, such lies in history textbook exist in lots of countries in the world as long as “patriotism”, “nationalism”, “ideology” exists. Unfortunately I don’t have such courage to speak out for truth and I am not so good at such academic research to write such books. I don’t know how to describe my feeling, I am not feeling quite happy but do not know the source of my torture.
@Iven You're not alone in your wishes. In the words of a most powerful song..."you may say I'm a dreamer but I'm not the only one...I hope someday you join us and the world will live as one."