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pandanfe profile picture
Let's discuss issues
by pandanfe
Last post
 August 24th
...See more What are the adult issues that you would like to discuss? 
tommy profile picture
20+ Automated Taglist!
by tommy
Last post
 April 20th
...See more Welcome to the 20+ Taglist This thread is an auto-updating list. The list is regularly updated by forum leaders and can be found below. Having issues? Reply below and someone will help you! Why should I join the taglist? ✔ Never miss out on sub-community check-ins, discussions or events ✔ Get tagged and notified by community leaders whenever a new relevant thread has been posted ✔ Become a more active member of the community. What do I need to do? ✅ To add yourself to this taglist, press the Post to Thread button below and write the exact words Please add me. ❌ To remove yourself from this taglist, press the Post to Thread button below and write the exact words Please remove me. ------------------------- Current taglist as of 29th July (updated by @tommy) @azuladragon34 @Dawnie0203 @forcefulThinker186 @HarmonyBlossom @Racey08 @Rainer111 @TannDee @tommy
chyni profile picture
The Twenties Deadline Myth: Why We Need to Stop Treating Our 20s Like a Sprint
by chyni
Last post
 4 hours ago
...See more Is it just me, or does it feel like everyone in their twenties is constantly stressing about having their whole life figured out? Lately I’ve been thinking about this whole idea that by 25 or 30, we’re supposed to have the house, the perfect job, the money, and the full lifetime plan locked in. It feels like we're all running this invisible race just so we can finally breathe when we hit our thirties. Honestly, it’s exhausting. Yes, working hard and planning for the future matters, but we’re also supposed to be living right now. Here are a few things that have been bugging me about all this pressure:  We’re expected to know what we want when most of us are still figuring things out, and changing your mind or trying something new gets treated like a failure instead of just learning.  It’s so easy to look at what other people are doing and feel like we’re falling behind, even when we’re doing our best.  We get so focused on these huge goals that we completely ignore the small wins, like just taking care of ourselves or getting through a tough week. We shouldn't have to burn ourselves out or pause our actual lives just to check off boxes on a timeline someone else made up. It's okay to sit back, relax a bit, and just figure things out as we go. Does anyone else feel like they're caught up in this race, or is it just me? What’s one small thing you’ve done recently that you haven't given yourself enough credit for?
Literallymeaf profile picture
Want friends and maybe something mor
by Literallymeaf
Last post
 5 hours ago
...See more I would love to find my own person, and just have a genuine connection with them. I’m a real loner but I can be fun so please give me a chance  20 years old, female
HelloKittyBow profile picture
Need someone to talk too for severe anxiety almost 24/7
by HelloKittyBow
Last post
 1 day ago
...See more Hi there, I am 22, I do suffer with everyday functioning life because of an anxiety disorder I have and it stops me from doing everything and anything like friends, school & work. My family is all i got and most of the times and they’re busy. I did recently start virtual therapy but I just feel like I need a buddy to talk too whenever im feeling so anxious and need some support…It has grown on me and I dont know how to stop the anxiety when it starts and it just turns into a million thoughts. I do also get physical symptoms and things from anxiety and it does scare me enough to make me have health anxiety too. That also causes more anxiety on my plate alone. I just want to be okay and normal. I don’t want to be like this anymore and wonder if there is ever going to be a time where im not like this anymore. I just need someone there for me and I could be there for you if you could relate. Please don’t hesitate too reach out. Thank you.
powerfulLychee8271 profile picture
Searching for some good friends to deal with unsettling thoughts
by powerfulLychee8271
Last post
 Monday
...See more Hiii
Sunsetsandrises profile picture
Looking for a friend
by Sunsetsandrises
Last post
 Monday
...See more Hey! Looking for someone new to talk to! Preferably a women but anyone is welcome tbh. My interests are gaming and teen drama shows. I have a cat too 😄
charmingAcres779 profile picture
What do women usually feel towards men who are virgins at 22-23?
by charmingAcres779
Last post
 Monday
...See more In need of some advice , I'm a 22 years old male who is turning 23 in 2 short months in November I am still a Virgin and don't know if I should even bother entering the dating scene now afraid I have lost my prime time for having normal chances  I live in very rural Pennsylvania (USA so western culture) so Every women I'm around my age are sexually experienced, been in long-term relationships and in fact many have already are having families I know many 22 year old women on the second child, and i feel so fundamentally behind that when most women do find out I'm a virgin at this age they will find it highly unattractive and leave and reject me ? Also I was diagnosed with PDDNOS (now known as part of the autism spectrum which means you have very low traits but don't naturally do well with the social stuff which I have improved as I've aged ), and I also had substance use issues for most of my teens and early 20s so I dedicated a lot of time to that, but I've working through that so I don't have much relationship experience either . now I feel I'm at that age where most women wont understand my situation or want to help me become . So what age do most sexually experienced women generally find it unusual or become wary to the point passing up a virgin man In the US western culture , are my options likely limited now ? 
agreeableOak7906 profile picture
friend
by agreeableOak7906
Last post
 Monday
...See more I want a friend to accompany me for the rest of my life.
NoxVeyra028 profile picture
What am I
by NoxVeyra028
Last post
 Sunday
...See more I believe my husbands lies for so long when I look in the mirror. My husband is all I see. Why did I deserve this. I have his everyone can think it's ok to hurt whoever they want however they want.
WarmSpark profile picture
Base, to be happy
by WarmSpark
Last post
 Saturday
...See more To be happy, focus on Self-awareness, Self-love and confidence: Self-awareness is base of how you see yourself and accept it, before you ASSUME how others see you. Self-love is when you already who you really are, love yourself. We all have flaws. Confidence in this sense is, When you love yourself, have confidence that others love you too, even if not all. Those who judge others mostly get worst than the people they judge, live your life in your style and rules.
sociableClementine4210 profile picture
Seeking for genuine friendship
by sociableClementine4210
Last post
 Saturday
...See more Looking for a friendship built on authenticity over performance,,where we can talk openly, share what’s actually on our minds, and genuinely listen without judgment. No pretending, impressing, or romanticizing things. Just two people being completely real with each other.
thedeepbluesea203 profile picture
26 & extremely lost - Vent
by thedeepbluesea203
Last post
 Saturday
...See more — I’m as real as you’re ever going to get and that scares people. I’m over it. I’ve chosen to shut the world off to reset myself from the noise. Too much noise. And all I’ve ever wanted was an equal to match with. 6 years of commitment down the drain. I’m too kind, too patient and I have been caring for everyone around me as my youth slips away. I’m done taking the low ball caregiver left over roles and I’m done staying silent. (Although.. silence brings clarity so I think I’ll still choose that if it doesn’t interfere with my growth) — I fear I’ll become one of the biggest things I hate because of this change I’ve been forced to seek. A mean and horrible person lacking humanity and morality for the fleeting dopamine rush of attention for my hard work. So I feel I must now climb my way to the top of society (not the top but to get myself to a place where I can find internal peace) I hope I don’t lose myself because of the pain and ignorance other people bestow upon me. I want to see the world thrive as a unit. I want to be one with the universe. And I want true freedom of expression where violence is no longer necessary. I don’t want to work until my bones are brittle and I’m riddled with cancer from the chemicals I’ve bathed in. I want my food to be real, where seasons for fruit are brought back when chicken wings are small and healthy and I don’t have to worry about baby carrots being the trashed carrots soaked in bleach to appear healthy to eat. But it’s like no one else REALLY wants this and everyone is afraid so they stay glued to their phones and content, their work to survive bare minimum and occasionally go to concerts and events, buying crap and consuming. For they are happy right where they are even if they’re unhappy. They decide there is a brick wall in front of them and so they make everything accessible within the brick wall miserable. For them to say “welcome to real life you can’t always get what you want” (this is not the point) and it’s insane that WE can still change our outcome and surroundings. It takes sacrifice. But everyone is too attached to their stuff. So nothing will be given up and so nothing will change. Or maybe they do want it but don’t know how to get there. But I can’t stick around to watch anymore. — I like staying up to date but there comes a point where the noise begins to be too much. It’s debilitating when everyone is repeating the same thing but not changing. And so I’m here. Not to debate. Not to argue a point. Keep in mind I’m venting. — Anyway the straw the broke the camels back is my husband wants divorce because he can’t keep up and says he’s holding me back from being something great. I’ve tried for 6 years to make it work with him. Fears he has bad genetics and that he has no self control and doesn’t know who he is. He fears hurting me one day and claims he’s a coward. He doesn’t believe in love and believes everything is a transaction. And it’s like despite how much he sees in the world, and how much loyalty and care I’ve given to him he forgets, can’t take it and retracts back. He asked me doesn’t it excite me to think about being with a better man? LOL WOW — So now I’m clearing out the apartment alone and I asked him for space since he wanted to do this crap on the phone over there losing his marbles. He checks in everyday (it’s been maybe 4 days) and it brings me great anxiety that I can’t bring myself to talk to him on the phone. He drives OTR so he’s never really home. . . Just paid for my mom’s 2 months past due mortgage. I got fired for being too expensive and not experienced enough even though they knew what they were hiring. So I’m not making any money. I spent everything is saved up on my mother so she could have a fresh start herself. It was so work intensive… taking on another household…it is not for the weak. My friends have serious problems, everyone I know is under the influence and my dad is not the person I thought he was. Infact my entire family is not. — Idk I’m looking around for work so like wtf am I doing? All I do is try and no one wants to keep up. No one wants to push alongside me even through the struggle. No one I’ve ever met do I know pushes through. No one I know is patient enough. So now I think I’m going to completely change myself and prepare for a new atmosphere. A new group entirely but that comes with struggles because you have to appear a certain way, act a certain way, value things a certain way but maybe I’ll find what I’m looking for up there. And that’s a life partner I can be myself around who moves how I move. I’m giving myself 2 years. I can’t take it anymore. — I’ll eventually go outside for errands and a job but for right this second the pain has drained me of all my emotions that I refuse to take any negativity and non productivity in. Which is why I’ve reverted to packing the apartment large enough to fit inside a hatchback. Everything else goes. Trash bye bye. Lease ends in Nov though. But what if I’m alone for a move … I need to be able to to fit in a car so if I find work outside of this state I can just pack up and go. — When I say alone I mean.. literally I have no one in this state. Well I have my cat :) but it’s enough that I’m considering getting a guard dog. I’m scared, man. I’m not scared of change….im scared to do it alone. And I’m especially scared to be hunted down as prey for not having a partner by my side.
proudWords6003 profile picture
Stop abandoning yourself...
by proudWords6003
Last post
 Saturday
...See more People will reject you. People will misunderstand you. Some will leave without explaining. Some will compare you to others. Some will only appreciate you when you're useful to them. And sometimes, despite your best efforts, you simply won't get what you wanted. None of those things automatically mean there is something wrong with you. Don't turn someone else's decision into a verdict on your worth. You don't have to become prettier, colder, richer, louder, more successful, or less emotional just to finally feel worthy of love and respect. Instead, ask: “If nobody were watching me, what kind of person would I want to become?” Then slowly become that person. Take care of your body. Learn things because you're curious. Pray because you need your Creator, not because you're trying to impress people. Set boundaries. Apologize when you're wrong. Leave places that repeatedly destroy your peace. Build skills. Make mistakes. Start again. Help people without forgetting yourself. And most importantly: Your life is not supposed to be a constant audition for other people's approval. You are allowed to grow quietly. You are allowed to outgrow people. You are allowed to change your mind. You are allowed to start late. You are allowed to be a beginner. You are allowed to have bad days without calling yourself a failure. Don't spend your entire life trying to prove that you're worthy of having a life. You already have one. Now live it intentionally. 🌱

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