Parents
am I the only one who grew up with unaffectionate parents my parents are responsible and not aggressive although my dad beat me when I was young to discipline me I don’t blame him a lot back in the days that’s all they knew and he stopped when I became a teenager
But regardless my parents have always been in bad mood I don’t remember them enjoying life ever
Our entire life has been just my mom nagging us to do this and don’t do that
That stuff continued to this day and iam 26
In my culture we continue to live with parents as we grow cause we don’t like to abandon them as they grow older and need more attention
But I feel like everyday I spend here I get angry
I’ve been angry because that’s the only emotion that feels familiar at home and sadness but if you act happy or show different opinions than u won’t hear the end of it
As I grew I obviously feel their love through their responsible support for me but it doesn’t fix my chronic bad mood there was a time where when I would go out people are happy and iam just stunned when I see families being happy and affectionate
But my parents aren’t they even made me hate my cat I’ve wanted one my entire life and got one last two years or so but it’s like I gave them a reason to hate again to put their angry on my cat again they do take care of it bc it lives with us but still they nag a lot especially my mom
I don’t know what being happy is
@bestAcres8668
I can relate to much of what you are experiencing. My parents were not as affectionate as most. They were hard working serious minded people who were always tired. I eventually came to the realization, that they too were victims of a hard life with few to no rewards. I bet that your life will improve once you get out of school. Can I ask how school is going well for you?
I did graduate last year but I failed to get into my dream job or anything close to it im now doing something less stressful doesn’t pay well and I feel bad for my parents cause all they did was invest in my education no joy no enthusiasm just for it to lead anywhere and i kinda started to blame them for not letting me enjoy my life do more things of what I like instead of obsessing over school I keep failing and recently I came to the e réalisation that I was never good enough and my mom kept pushing me to get better grades to make my self esteem be built on those grades and now I feel like I did nothing with my life I guess life doesn’t reward hard work so why did take it too seriously and drag me into it
@bestAcres8668
From what you are saying, I feel that you are a success story. How many people can say that they graduated and have a job. The fact that it is a less stressful job is a big plus. Most people I know are suffering from poor health due to the stress of their jobs. I understand that this is not your dream job, but, enjoy this while it lasts. I think any type of work will look good on a resume. I am wondering, are there any avenues for you to build or develop this job? Also, are you actively looking for another job? Another plus to having this less stressful job, doesn't that give you more time for you? Time for you to go out and time for you to decide where you want with your life? Questions, questions, questions...do I ask to many questions? Let me reiterate, I feel that you are a success story; enjoy your success!
You are the first person to congratulate me for my job it’s a teaching job it’s less stressful because I can choose my time of work and only work with few people so it doesn’t get hectic The platform I use takes most of the percentage of what the client pays so I feel underpaid but it was nice to feel useful and connect with people through this job, I can use different platforms I just need to learn to be better at selling I do have a lot of time but these days I wake up and I have a lot of time to do so many things but I just feel worthless thinking about all I lost years of hard work in my major all the trials I failed and opportunities I lost I keep rewinding reliving it all it doesn’t help that I live in a city with just building not enough parks to breathe in
I’ve been thinking these days to move somewhere more calm since I work online but I need better rent but I agree that any work is better than nothing
You are the first person to congratulate me for my job it’s a teaching job it’s less stressful because I can choose my time of work and only work with few people so it doesn’t get hectic The platform I use takes most of the percentage of what the client pays so I feel underpaid but it was nice to feel useful and connect with people through this job, I can use different platforms I just need to learn to be better at selling I do have a lot of time but these days I wake up and I have a lot of time to do so many things but I just feel worthless thinking about all I lost years of hard work in my major all the trials I failed and opportunities I lost I keep rewinding reliving it all it doesn’t help that I live in a city with just building not enough parks to breathe in
I’ve been thinking these days to move somewhere more calm since I work online but I need better rent but I agree that any work is better than nothing
@bestAcres8668 To answer your first sentence, you're definitely not alone. In fact, my situation is much more extreme. When I was young, my father treated me badly when I was 2 or 3. He threw a brick at my head when I was in primary school and wanted to send me to a psychiatric hospital when I was in high school. All of my relatives know that I've almost lost contact with my parents. I only go back home once a year.
There hasn't been a single happy moment between my parents and me throughout my entire life. But recently, I realized that life is long, and we still have to spend a lot of time together. Instead of keeping each other in a painful state, I would rather try to build a relationship that can lead to a win-win situation. I've decided to rebuild our relationship and create a new way of getting along, by whatever means necessary.
If we can't reach that kind of relationship, I would simply let go of it. But I would still support them financially if they needed it. Sometimes, we may still need some communication and boundaries. I'm not sure if you also need to build some boundaries, especially mentally. I hope my experience can give you another perspective.