The emptiness.
Hey everyone, thanks for hearing me out.
A couple of years ago, I was genuinely doing great. I had amazing friends, a good job, and life just didn't feel heavy. But lately, everything has shifted. I’ve lost those friends, and the girl I really cared about doesn't speak to me anymore because of some bad misunderstandings. There is a new girl in my life now who is honestly amazing, but no matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to feel anything towards her.
There’s this constant emptiness inside me, even when I keep myself busy. I’ve reached a point where I don't want to talk to anyone. I don't want to be in anyone's life. I fantasize about packing everything up and moving somewhere where nobody knows my name, but deep down, I know that won't fix anything and it’s not really possible anyway.
I feel like the two people who still talk to me are just doing it out of formality, like they’re forced to reply rather than wanting to. I hate feeling this empty. I wake up, get on with the day, and repeat the cycle. It’s exhausting. I’ve tried therapy and put in the work to improve myself and on paper, things are going smoothly but that void is still there.
@purpleCar6052
Hey there, thanks so much for posting and for sharing your experiences. I'm really sorry to hear that you've been feeling this way. I've definitely been there in the past - that feeling of being totally numb and wanting to cut yourself off from everyone is so hard to cope with.
I totally hear you about things going well on paper - it's funny, but that can sometimes make it even worse, because you feel like you shouldn't be feeling this way.
It's amazing that you've tried therapy - have you been able to address these feelings with your therapist, do they know the full extent of them?
Let me know if you'd like to talk 1:1, I'd be really happy to listen as best I can.
Hey, @Lyra! Thanks for the reply. It really helps to hear that someone else understands that 'on paper' struggle. I'm definitely open to chatting 1:1 if you're still up for it. Thank you for being so supportive.
@purpleCar6052
Of course, feel free to shoot me a message and we can fix up a time to talk!