Setting boundaries

And what if they are close to us?

Only you can make that decision; however, i have found that keeping people in my life who dont respect me causes me to have a lot of anxiety and exhaustion. Further, it also creates a situation where i begin to devalue myself. walking away from people who don't respect my boundaries has been really difficult in some instances, but the friends i do have show me care and respect. i trust them and this has helped me to feel safe, secure, and happy in my life.

It is a struggle tho, i moved across the country right before the pandemic and found myself close to some abusive family that i had cut off and am feeling a lot of judgement from some people about that. I've also only met a few people here. The closest one to me i recently walled away from for similar reasons and i currently feel pretty lonely and am grieving that loss... but i will say that my self esteem has already begun to feel a bit better after walking away and i feel much less anxiety. It's just currently difficult because i feel alone right now. Humans are pack animals and factoring that in when deciding whether or not to walk away is important i think.

You deserve to feel safe and respected 🖤

I say yes. People that let go on their own, when you set boundaries do you a favor. I feel God will remove people for a season or even life time. If they are toxic. I’ve put my foot down with my husbands family. They defend each others toxic behaviors. I am not ok with that. Maybe because it’s not my blood family it is easier. But it feels good not to have to jump through hoops for people or unable behavior or sweep the toxic under the rug. There is freedom in setting boundaries. I’m all for it. But that’s my perspective. we are all built different and have different life experiences.

@reliableCranberry4446 As others have stated, it's a personal decision that shouldn't be influenced by what others tell you.

Someone who is blatantly focused on themselves (and their own image) and responds to your triumphs with putdowns or skepticism doesn't add much insight or inspiration, except, perhaps, as a demonstration of a tragic character - someone lacking a fully developed ego. However, when this same individual resorts to character assassination and/or setting you up to fail, it's well beyond the topic of "boundaries".

On family of origins (FOO), some say blood is thicker than water, others say it isn't. Then, you have individuals forced to depend on a "challenging" individual because of a financial or binding issue. Personally, I can't be "bought" (and really wish I had such an inclination earlier in life).