I want to learn how to communicate.
I am unable to communicate in an effective manner regarding my emotions. I think it goes beyond that to the point I’m not sure what my subtle emotions are. Sure I know when I’m furious or jubilant but I often “find” myself having an extreme feeling. Im not so sure how I found myself there.
I have long since struggled with toxic masculinity. I’ve got the hero complex. I’ve got explosive road rage (when I am alone it’s all I can do to keep it under control some days). I argue on social media. I have feelings of inadequacy that I find I take out on other people. My biggest problem, how do I talk about this stuff? I’ve been listening to the Man Enough podcast for a bit and guest came on that said “step into the fear”.
So I’m terrified. I’m not sure if it stems because I fear judgement from others or because I fear failure. I fear I’ll be judged for failing too. I feel like this has caused me to become distant from all my relationships and I often hurt the few relationships I do have left. A common scenario for me is to tell someone I’m going to do something and fail to complete the task, but manipulate the situation after the task hasn’t been completed so that sometimes the other party feels like it’s their fault they feel less than by my actions.
Ive been in contact with a local college that offers a group program for people with anxiety and depression. It’s free so I feel like I have to do it when it starts, but I have never done any group work before. I’m very hesitant as I have so much trouble expressing myself in safe spaces. I’m not sure what to expect.
Thanks for sticking around. Have a wonderful day!
@cupless Hey, thank you for being open and honest about what you are thinking and feeling. It sounds like you are learning a lot about self-reflection and recognizing emotions. Those are wonderful steps as you learn how to manage your emotions better.
I can imagine that walking into a group support situation would be very unnerving and unsettling. You might be thinking that people would judge you, or look at you in a negative way, or that you might have to speak in a room full of strangers, and how it will probably be uncomfortable and difficult. I like that you are listening to that podcast. I think that the term "do it scared" is a good one - to me, it means that you are recognizing that scared, anxious feeling you have, and you are pushing through it in order to get to the other side, to something different and better.
As another resource, please consider reviewing this 7 cups guide about managing emotions - https://www.7cups.com/help-managing-emotions/
I really appreciate the comment and interaction! Thank you!
I watched/worked through several of the pages the link sent me too! Thanks so much!
@cupless Hi, again. I was thinking about what you said, that you aren't comfortable expressing yourself, even in safe spaces. And it reminded me that 7cups is a safe space, and here you are expressing yourself clearly in the forums! Look at that! Chatting 1:1 with a listener is another way that you could "practice" expressing yourself to someone who is a virtual stranger.
When does the support group begin? I wish you all the best as you navigate another this journey!
Thank you! The listeners make sense but I have had bad luck thus far. I may try again in the future though.
So yesterday I had a phone interview to make sure I was a candidate for the group therapy. I made it past that round and now I’ll take an intake exam on Feb 16th. They do this as a pre/post therapy evaluation of the therapy effectiveness. I assume on that day I’ll find out when the therapy starts. I also just realized this morning that I never asked if it was in person or telehealth. I haven’t been in a room with a stranger in over 3 years now. I hope it’s telehealth! Lol
Thank you for taking interest in my post and even offering me a follow up. Amazing! Thanks!