My husband wanted a divorce last week,came back, and now tonight he says he doesn't know if it can work out?
Last week out of the blue my husband said it was over. He went to work and I started making plans to move out and stuff. I have several mental problems and he has never understood or even wanted to. This past year I just went down with my health mentally and physically. I couldn't keep the house clean . I did the best I could. He never went "without" even times I was physically sick he still got his needs... he says I don't keep the house clean enough and that since I am a housewife I should have no problem. Our house is not bad or dirty . It's just not perfect. We have been married 9 yrs and never had a problem this bad...it would make sense if he was seeing someone else but he is not ...he won't let me get a job either....so I am just wondering what I should do...
@emotionalOwl5300 Firstly you should take a moment and ask yourself whether your needs are being met
@emotionalOwl5300 Your husband not wanting to understand your mental conditions seems like a lopsided arrangement to me And a huge red flag Did he say why he wants to get divorced? If it's not another person maybe you can ask what the specific issue is and agree on a plan of action to course correct your marriage Either way you should start to prepare yourself for the worst case scenario
He keeps going back and forth. All he said is I didn't keep the house clean enough. I have been trying my best...yes I am preparing..I just don't like the mind games....
@emotionalOwl5300 Have you taken some time to think about what you really want? The back and forth and mind games must be wearing on you From my experience as a housewife there's a tendency to always put his needs first
Yes his needs are first. He has control. I have nothing unless I'm with him and he made sure of that . I havent worked in 10 yrs , I quit my job for him and everything. I am almost 50 and I am just tired of this ....
@emotionalOwl5300 I'm so sorry that he's doing this to you
Thanks for caring!
@emotionalOwl5300 I know that what you're feeling is devastating You shouldn't be treated this way During this tough time try to be kind and loving to yourself
@emotionalOwl5300
I'll preface this by saying I'm a guy, it isn't his decision whether you work or not. If you want a job, get a job. If the house isn't perfect the way he wants ask him to finish it off to make it perfect.