Blah, losing control
Hello all, I figured I’d give this a try. Find someone to talk to and all. As I find myself at 14 months into teleworking... I am finding myself losing control. I get frustrated more quickly, and since I’ve been alone for all this time I am also more quick to let that frustration lead to anger. I hated teleworking before Covid, now I despise it. I live alone, my family is 2000 miles away. All my sports and social activities have been placed on hold. While I am an introvert I am not made to be a hermit. My job is a stressful one and I am currently in a training phase that has a lot of debriefed designed to brow beat you.... so, it’s all completely drowning me with anxiety, depression, and anger. Without Covid and remote, I am incredibly hard on myself and I do expect high standards. This does not help when my trining is designed to point out all mistakes, at nausium. I am not really nice to myself. Now add COVID and the frustration and anger and I feel like I am self destructing. Like I can’t get a win in and everything I try to do is coming up short. It makes me feel kinda worthless. I ignore all the success and dwell on the misses... Well that’s my story in a nut shell. Thanks
I hate that you’re I feel like that! I can relate if you’ve been feeling isolated lately. I recently had to cut contact with a lot of close family and shortly after moving out on my own feeling very alone I was lucky enough to meet an amazing group of people in the house I moved into..
But then I went back to school which is quite some distance away, and with Covid I basically am alone in my dorm with my homophobic roommate that hates me for no legitimate reason ALL THE TIME. But what helps me is know that this phase is temporary. And, maybe this current feeling of solidarity could be channeled into you doing things solely for you.. learning about yourself and getting time to care for yourself entirely, and ultimately preparing you to be the best you possible when you finally get to find and be with those people that you make your family