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Weekend Check-In July 5-7, 2019

User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 July 5th, 2019

Hi everyone, how are you doing today? What is something you are looking forward to do this weekend?laugh

Being together with others can be very pleasant, having fun together, sharing stories or even having some hot debates. We do not share the same opinions all the time, sometimes situations escalate and things are said which we or the other person regret lateron. When something is said, it cant be taken back, its out but if we feel it was wrong we still can apologize or if its the other side we would usually expect an apology but this does not happen all the time.

enlightenedWhy do you think it ist so hard to apologize?

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User Profile: Tazzie
Tazzie July 5th, 2019

@amiablePeace77
I am doing alright, thank you. How are you? I'm looking forward to finishing up a few projects and exercising.
Reasons for not wanting to apologize differ from person to person. Some that come to mind are:
a. Not wanting to bring in shame.
b. They are comfortable with anger and emotional distance.
c. Comfortable with blaming external sources everytime.

Thank you for another great check-in! Take care.

1 reply
User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 OP July 7th, 2019

@Tazzie

Tazzie, thanks for coming in. These are 3 big points, the fear of failure and low self-esteem, adopting wrong patterns which become habitual and the distortion blaming.

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User Profile: stressBear
stressBear July 5th, 2019

@amiablePeace77 Hi! I think I'm more-or-less okay right now. The facts that my wife's health is improving and my sister is here for the weekend help a lot.

Since my sister is here I'm hoping to do some singing with her. We're both songwriters and perform together sometimes.

Apologies are hard for a variety of reasons. Embarrassment is one. Shame is another. Not wanting appear {stupid, weak, whatever} is another. I often have the opposite problem, and apologize for things that aren't my fault.

3 replies
User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 OP July 7th, 2019

@stressBear

Hi Bear, it's worrying if a loved one is sick, glad it's getting better and that you have such a nice sister to help. Have fun with the singing.

Over-apologizing can become a habit, whilst it is nice to be considerate taking the blame for everything can impact your self-confidence. What do you think about asking yourself: "Is an apology needed?"

2 replies
User Profile: stressBear
stressBear July 7th, 2019

@amiablePeace77 Thanks! The singing was, indeed, fun, although neither of us was in shape or in practice for more than a handful of songs.

Good suggestion about apologizing. I'll have to work on slowing down what's now almost an automatic reaction to things going wrong.

1 reply
User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 OP July 9th, 2019

@stressBear

Hope you need to get off that autopilot of taking the blame very soon 🧡.

Hey, whether in shape or not - as long as you enjoy it, singing can never be wrong 😁

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User Profile: Lauren63
Lauren63 July 5th, 2019

I am fine. I dont have a problem with apologizing when I have said something wrong to another person. I have apologized more on 7cups than in RL. Wish others could also.

3 replies
User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 OP July 7th, 2019

@Lauren63

Lauren, I find everyone apologizing for things they did wrong shows great strength. yes Sorry though that people do not treat you the same way if they do something wrong to you.

What makes it different in yrl?

2 replies
User Profile: Lauren63
Lauren63 July 7th, 2019

@amiablePeace77 because I am face to face. You tend to have more filters, and you know you have to deal with them in RL all the time. So you dont say how you feel. You just go on.

1 reply
User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 OP July 9th, 2019

@Lauren63

Lauren, I hope though, there are also people iyrl whom you can tell how you feel. You cn definitively do it here, we are your friends. 🧡

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User Profile: forko23
forko23 July 6th, 2019

Today is the first day of the best of my life!

4 replies
User Profile: loyalDay5445
loyalDay5445 July 7th, 2019

@forko23

Oh. Yeah. Thing are going well. I am happy. Life is good.

User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 OP July 7th, 2019

@forko23

Yaaay forko - awesome to hear laughyes. What made it such a great day (if you feel free to share)?

2 replies
User Profile: forko23
forko23 July 8th, 2019

@amiablePeace77

This is the only day I have. Tomorrow hasn't arrived yet and yesterday is already gone. Memories and dreams aren't usually as great as they seem when they appear. Today though I can put my hands on that so that's what makes it the best!! Location, location, location! Right here, right now! Today I'm choosing to bloom where I find myself planted. wink

1 reply
User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 OP July 9th, 2019

@forko23

Thank you for sharing these beautiful words with us smiley

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