I just wanted to be loved and appreciated
I am a 22-year-old boy from a middle-class background.
I am currently studying in college.
About two years ago, I used to look quite good. But suddenly my hair started falling, I began to lose weight, and I became very skinny. Slowly, my appearance changed and my looks started getting worse. Even so, I want validation like everyone else. I want people to find me attractive when they see me. I want that too. But deep down, I feel that maybe this is no longer possible for me in this lifetime.
I have never experienced physical intimacy with anyone. I want to experience it at least once, but I feel like that may never happen. These thoughts make me feel extremely negative about myself. No one has ever approached me or shown interest in me.
I no longer feel confident as a man.
These days, I feel very desperate for validation, and I am experiencing hyperseexual thoughts. I was diagnosed with borderline bipolar disorder (BPD) two years ago. I am also confused about my career and have no clear idea about my future. My hair loss has become severe, and it affects me deeply.
More than anything, I want a girl who would like me as a man. But I feel that I will never receive this kind of validation in my life.
I don’t know how to make myself understand this reality or how to calm my mind.
I feel lost.
I hate myself.
@honestSky6826 I had to shave my head for work for a year in my 20's. Yes, very different treatment from women, much worse. Put on a hat and they were friendly again. I decided to go shave it forever because it cut to the truth more quickly. I found genuine people much more quickly, discarded losers much more quickly. I put on some muscle, worked hard on my career. Here's the biggest surprise: Dating came way easier bald at age 38 with a good career than it ever did when I was 22 and good looking with hair. Don't think that you've passed up your best opportunity to have a great relationship and sex. That's only true for people who only have their looks. Build a great career (it might take a decade or two), and make genuine friends along the way. Once you have a handful of solid friends and a great career you will relax and enjoy your life, and that will attract women. I had way better sex, way better relationships from 38 to 45 than all previous decades combined. Women want a man who is more accomplished in life than they are, looks are less important than what you've done in life once they turn 22. Yes, looks matter alot to women 22 and younger. But once they graduate from college at age 22, they want a man who has accomplished things. There is so much more to you than your looks. You won't even recognize who you are in 10 years, for all of the interesting things you accomplish, experiences you'll have.
Thanks for sharing..it will help
