T/w- Pornography addiction & Rough physical intimacy porn need support
I suffer from cptsd and I feel immense pain i used to watch pornography to numb my mind from the pain it was not really about lust or anything I don't have therapy so whenever I feel pain my brain push me to numb my mind watching this but now I feel like I can't even stop myself to watch it i m getting addicted to rough physical intimacy porn and it gives me anxiety...What if it turn me into a monster I don't want to become it just making me feel more ashamed n bad.. even though I don't feel any wrong things looking at any women still i feel bad
@SoulRising
Addictions are well known as coping strategies to deal with difficult feelings. And pain definitely is difficult. It sounds like you already know his connection and thus that to deal with the addiction, the pain likely needs to be confronted.
Of course this is daunting. But there is no need to do it alone. Listeners, therapy, support groups, all have helped me.
While I can understand your concern at the type of habit you have developed, the type is largely secondary to accepting that you have a habit and that the solution is to address the driving motivation. Once the pain is resolved, the motivation and the habit goes, and once gone, the type of habit becomes irrelevant.
You deserve to be pain free.