Boyfriends a pill addict
I’m currently 34 weeks pregnant with our second child and he went into rehab In January which is when he confessed how bad his addiction was. He didn’t last long only completed 4 days and left on day 5. I’ve since the. Have been beyond stressed dealing with the kn and off withdrawals and detoxing. The lies about the money having to pay everything because he says he hasn’t gotten paid or he owed someone. He just recently went back go rehab and got out a week ago he hasted 10 days and this week I thought was fine until he went to our old town to start his boxing classes and I seen he took out an extra 10 out of his account. Lied to me about it and hasn’t really spoke to me. He is gaslighting the situation and making me feel like im seeing demons where there aren’t. He hasn’t spoken to me really since he got back from practice yesterday. I expressed how I felt and have been emotional since. He hasn’t smoked a cigarette which is something he does all day to help with his cravings. He’s constantly going to the bathroom. Or locking himself in our spare room. I hear him sniffing like crazy and just doing patterns he was doing while using. He will not talk to me. Has not came downstairs to talk to me. We were texting and again he gaslighted me or ignored everything I said. I’m just so sad and disheartened because our first son has to watch mommy downstairs holding back tears while his dad is spaced out playing the game.
My sweet child, you should be hugged right now, i would hope there could be a friend nearby you. I don't know your sentimental relationship with him, but it s not just you and him. There is a baby who need a mother atleast, a figure to hold on same for the new coming one. You cannot see your life only in to the present, you need to focus on the future, a future where you will make projects for you and the kids, what schools they will do, how they will be as adult, and everything that makes the live worth to be lived. But you cannot be a mother for your husband/boyfriend. You cannot tell him what to do or not, where to go or not. He is an adult and he is a father, be a mother with your sons and a wife/girlfriend with him. Do not stay there waiting for a change, he is not worthing the waiting right now. Maybe he will be one day who knows but, in the meantime, you need to focus on yourself and the kids. So stop talking to him trying to make him to be something he is not. Leave it be, at least for now, take a pause, go and stay with your parents or your friends or a charity place if you do not have enough money. Suck it up, bring to this world another life and keep on keep it on, you will be on your feet soon enough. Search for help, there is always at least one person ready to help, don t give up. Most importantly, don't believe him. He will do exactly what you want for a while and then go back to his behaviour, it a cycle you have to break sweet one. Only you can. I hope you best regards and a virtual hug waiting for a real one.
I really appreciate those words because it is hard. And virtual hug has been accepted and needed! Even now he still hasn’t talked to me I went upstairs and he’s playing his game and nodding off and when I questioned him he said he’s just tired I’m overreacting. It’s just scary because no one knows this on my family and every time we think it’s getting better he makes it worse and I don’t want to be looked down on or anything. But this is my apartment his name isn’t in the lease and we’ve been going have just recently prior I was paying the full amount with my job but had to leave because of his situation it was unreliable to have him with our son alone just cause he’s be constantly nodding off and detoxing or something. So I quit and have since then been living off my savings while he pays half. It just sucks because we’ve been together in each other’s lives since 18 and now being 28 it’s like how does one walk away without fear of him taking too much and leaving both our children fatherless.
That's why i said to consider it like a pause beetween you. This situation is really delicate. I don't know what are the rules in your country, but if anytime someone would say your husband situation to police they could take away the children too. Instead of live in to fear, talk with your family, you have to ask for help, it s for him too indirectly, they will help you to keep you straight on the best decision, ask them to help, it s not a betrayal. Sometime you need this kind of action to set up a good enough environment in a relationship and remember that you should consider your relationship not for how much you have been but how much you felt loved and how much you want to love back. It s like a balance, it never have to go on one side only. You do not have to fear loneliness without him when living with him is not even enough good. Somewhere in you i am sure you believe to have to be sad, to had earn to be in pain but you are not. Please, you are an indipendent woman, do it now until you still have the strong from youth, do not wait to explode in rage, sadness is enough to move on. Even if you will not do everything together, atleast, talk to someone who really cares about you, atleast that, and take more advice from him/her/them. You are not alone as you think you are, i am sure of it.
