I have this crazy side of me
I’m in my 20s and a female. I had sexual urges when I was a child. I don’t know why. I did some physical touches with other kids. No sex no genitals..just touching to feel something. One kid noticed and called us out and so I stopped. Until this day I feel guilty about it as it was very predatory. The urges came back after I hit puberty. I touched my private parts just to feel that something. I just liked it so I did it. Then it stopped. I’m not sure if I felt guilty and wanted to stop or it just did. I have been struggling with depression and anxiety since I was a teenager. Loneliness is one the root of the problem. A few years ago, I had this sexual tension and the urges to touch myself came back and I learned how to masturbate, did it a few times and stopped because I felt it was wrong. Lately I’ve been doing it again. I bought a vibrator too. I kept reaching for my vibrator so I had to throw it away. But I still masturbated on my own. I just think that this isn’t healthy and it’s getting addictive. I’m aware that as an adult I have sexual urges. I’ve never had sex in my life and I prefer to practice abstinence. I think there’re some kind of underlying problem that I don’t know of. I hope someone can help me out.
Hi, what you are doing is completely normal. Most women are afraid or feel awkward admitting it, but for a couple of days a month, when a woman is ovulating, her sexual desires go through the roof and she is ready to go; and by go I mean go. Do not blame yourself for it, it is just biological. The cold hard truth is that the world in which we live does not empower women to do what they want (i.e., with their own body); instead, it punishes them. I feel bad for the kid that called you out as a kid, he is probably looking back now thinking he could have hit home run that day!
Hi there passionate owl, when I read your post, it was me looking into a mirror, almost exactly what you went through and felt, I did too. I worry so much about myself, like I'm so bad that there is no hope, for me. Please know though, your not alone and it took courage to be able to open up about it, I truly appreciate that.
Hello
