Anxious after trying to stand up for myself

I really hate confrontation. this past weekend my friend and I had planned a trip that they had already cancelled on once. The first time they said they had too much work. The second time they said it was because they needed alone time. they were not going to bring it up and hope I forgot about plans. Both are valid reasons to cancel, but it is discouraging and it is even more discouraging when your friend’s plan was to ghost you if you did not bring it up. To top it all off, I found out that they went on the planned trip anyway and that they just went alone. I was upset and wanted to address the fact that I felt excluded. It is hard to not take things personally. I just told them I was upset and they turned it back on me and said that I was not respecting their feelings and need for alone time when they feel bad. I hate letting people down but I am also trying not to be a pushover. My time is valuable too. Now I feel even more anxious than I did before. i worry that I am insensitive/a bad person. I feel kind of crazy and I felt ill while I was being berated. I feel like this set me back a month in my anxiety journey.