Ex problems

To start out I’m gay and 16 and I dated this guy for two months, we have been broken up for a month now. everything happened so fast we had sex the first time we meet up aftee we went in a date and we lived two hours away from each other. We called almost every day and talked for hours then one day he asked for a break and I said that we should break up if we’re going in a break because that means he’s not ready or he is already thinking about leaving I guess I got scared. Then he cried and begged for me to stay with him and to just sleep on it so I did. We woke up and we stayed together I made a plan on if he ever needed space he could have it and I would come down that week. Then we got drunk and we were watching a show on ft and he randomly said I’ve been thinking and what you said about us breaking up I think your right. And then everything went down from there we broke up tge next morning. He still begged me to come see him when I was supposed to tge next day. But I could tell he just wanted sex and it haunts me because what if I want down and it would have fixed everything what if he gave me a chance and I didn’t take it. But besides that I miss him a lot now and there’s way more I haven’t said but if anyone has a option on this I would really appreciate it.