Here I am
I've realized I probably need therapy in some way, but I don't know where to start, especially since we're on a tighter budget.
Here's a list of things that have wounded me the last few years:
-felt unappreciated at work, which led to job hunting, but ultimately realizing I feel stuck because I don't know what I want to do for a career change
-got pregnant, faced criticism for a multitude of reasons, called lazy while working at 8 months pregnant by a manager
-heard rumors about myself while pregnant
- every time I complained about something pre/postpartum my feelings were invalidated ("oh just wait until this stage, it's so much worse than now")
-uncle diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer
-maternal grandmother claims husband & I are neglectful parents for not baptizing our child
-uncle's condition deteriorates rapidly, passes away
-family strife over my dad forgiving his brother, uncle, on his deathbed
-dad offers to shoot himself over the discourse
-I find this out minutes before being sworn in as an organization's treasurer
-child diagnosed with hand, foot, and mouth disease
- I get overwhelmed with the training for the position. The minute I'm criticized I tell the organization I can't do it because I'm so stressed out.
I'm using this platform so that if or when I go talk to a licensed therapist, I already have some groundwork done and so that I can vent.
@friendlyMelon2158
Ваша ситуація дуже складна, і, ймовірно, навіть у терапевта виникнуть певні труднощі, але мені здається, що є деякі речі, які вже можна виділити. This is just my opinion and therefore you may disagree with it. It seems to me that you think too much about what others say, what others think about you, what is happening around you. You take responsibility for many things that do not directly concern you, don't you? Like your uncle, for example. A terrible disease, but you can't influence it in any way, and therefore there is no point in worrying about it other than simple sympathy. Then you accept other people's opinions as truth, like the words of your boss, people giving advice. Do you think that they are competent, but you are not? Could it be a lack of confidence? Could it be that a long time ago your parents or friends tried to convince you in the same way? In any case, you lack a little confidence and inner fortitude and I wanted to wish you to be strong no matter what! You cannot change many things, but you can fix your problems as much as they can be fixed. If not, then it is inevitable, so try to accept it. Hold on and be strong!