How to manage anxiety in a romantic relationship?
Hi! I have entered my first ever romantic relationship and I feel scared almost everyday, like what if it ends, what if i do things that she doesnt like but doesnt say, and so on
What i want to know is, how do i manage this so i dont distroy this relationship?
@shyPineapple4991
The biggest thing is to enjoy it.
Have fun.
Always be open and communicate with each other.
That's how you'll learn what she likes and doesn't like.
Just be kind.
Be respectful.
And youll be fine 💛
Thanks, i try to do my best, i have realised i was a bit too excited(initiated to much, wrote to much, complimented to much, at least thats what my friends told me) and now i want to give her some space, not go cold just regulate myself a bit
@shyPineapple4991
I get that, it is exciting , and there's nothing wrong with that and enjoying it, it's just about finding a balance that works for you both 💛
Yes i do think that i will also talk to have about this
I would recommend making friends with others not romantically platonically. You can discuss your strong feelings with them as well.
Statistically first relationships are rarely prime relationships in peoples lives. If you both help each other that’s all that matters.
To the end of helping each other communication skills are very valuable.
We often become child like when we fall in love. My mum sent me to my gran when i was one and three quarters so I get anxious I will be abandoned. Being honest about that allows partners when I have them to understand why I am abit crazy.
Honesty allows you to be you more and enjoy caring for her.
Platonic hugs
Sometimes these feelings can come from an attachment pattern, especially if love or emotional closeness hasn’t always felt completely safe in the past. It could be something from childhood, a previous relationship, or experiences where being vulnerable led to hurt or rejection.
So when you finally meet someone you really care about, your brain may start looking for possible threats—not because something is necessarily wrong, but because it’s trying to protect you.
That’s when thoughts like, “What if I do something she doesn’t like?” “What if I say the wrong thing?” “What if I mess this up?” “What if she leaves?” can start coming up.
It’s almost like your mind is trying to prepare you for the possibility of losing something before you’ve even had the chance to fully enjoy it.
The important thing is to remember that you don’t have to be perfect to keep a relationship. You’re allowed to make mistakes, misunderstand each other, have uncomfortable conversations, and still be loved. A healthy relationship isn’t about never doing anything the other person dislikes it’s about being able to communicate, repair, understand each other, and feel safe enough TO BE YOURSELF .
So when that fear comes up, instead of immediately believing “I might ruin this,” try asking yourself, “Is something actually wrong right now, or is an old part of me afraid of being hurt again?
Sometimes these feelings can come from an attachment pattern, especially if love or emotional closeness hasn’t always felt completely safe in the past. It could be something from childhood, a previous relationship, or experiences where being vulnerable led to hurt or rejection.
So when you finally meet someone you really care about, your brain may start looking for possible threats—not because something is necessarily wrong, but because it’s trying to protect you.
That’s when thoughts like, “What if I do something she doesn’t like?” “What if I say the wrong thing?” “What if I mess this up?” “What if she leaves?” can start coming up.
It’s almost like your mind is trying to prepare you for the possibility of losing something before you’ve even had the chance to fully enjoy it.
The important thing is to remember that you don’t have to be perfect to keep a relationship. You’re allowed to make mistakes, misunderstand each other, have uncomfortable conversations, and still be loved. A healthy relationship isn’t about never doing anything the other person dislikes it’s about being able to communicate, repair, understand each other, and feel safe enough TO BE YOURSELF .
So when that fear comes up, instead of immediately believing “I might ruin this,” try asking yourself, “Is something actually wrong right now, or is an old part of me afraid of being hurt again?
