My story: first relationship and internal conflict

Hi, I want to share my story because I need to process my emotions and organize my thoughts. I'm 16 years old and recently went through my first same-sex relationship, which lasted about six months. During that time, I tried to be faithful, honest, and respectful to my partner and my Christian faith. Sometimes I was afraid of losing him, I doubted myself, and I felt insecure. I want to tell everything without hiding anything, including my mistakes, his mistakes, and everything that happened afterward. I tried my best: I was faithful, I gave thoughtful gifts, I cared about his feelings, and I tried to support him. I always tried to respect my values and my faith. Sometimes I reacted with anxiety or insecurity, I compared situations, and I worried too much about what he thought. Even so, I felt I was doing the right thing, loving and caring for someone. During the relationship, he had attitudes that hurt me: he indirectly compared me to his deceased best friend, he wasn't always honest, and although he said he was working on himself, I didn't see any real changes. After we broke up, he quickly started another relationship just two weeks later, and he met him while we were still together. Since then, I've seen on social media that: His new boyfriend posts photos and videos with him, even edits and dedicated posts. They comment with affectionate words like "my baby," "my husband." He posts content he never showed me before, like *** videos, shirtless photos, or creative edits. He gives him gifts and constant attention. Seeing all of this made me feel sad, compared, insecure, and questioned if I wasn't enough, even though I know I gave my best in that relationship. Since the breakup, I've had many difficult thoughts: I compare myself to his new boyfriend, I think, "What if I wasn't enough?" or "What if I'll never be happy?" I feel guilt and fear of failing God because I chose to walk away from the relationship because of my faith. I'm afraid of the *** that my thoughts or emotions might hurt him, even though I know I acted out of love and honesty. Sometimes comments on social media attack me: “You’re just repressing yourself,” “Christianity is manipulating you,” or “You’ll never be happy.” All of this increases my anxiety and makes me doubt myself and my path. It hurts to see other people living their orientation freely, being happy, and feeling good about themselves, while I feel confusion, sadness, and guilt about my faith and my decisions. I feel like my life is upside down and that my world has no way out. Despite everything, I’m trying to heal and improve: I’ve taken up drawing again, I exercise, I try not to compare myself to others, I seek to strengthen my friendships, and I focus on my relationship with God in a healthy way. I also want to learn to better manage my intrusive thoughts, the anxiety, and the grief I feel. I want to be completely honest: I want to process both my mistakes and my ex’s, without judging myself or him, just to understand and heal. I need to learn to feel peace within myself, to trust in my worth, and to build mental stability before making important decisions about my love life or my identity. If you're reading this, please don't be cruel with your opinions, comments, or criticisms. I'm simply looking for someone to listen, understand, and respect me, without criticizing my Christian faith or judging my decisions. This is what I feel and what I need to express.