A little bit of progress but still struggling

I'm sorry that you were left without a response for so long. I am not unfamiliar to the feeling of being overwhelmed in school. I'm sorry that you are having to deal with this right now and I'm sorry that the school itself is triggering so many of these insecurities and fears. Normally my advice to people that are feeling similar to you is to conquer those fears. However, I think it might be better in your case to get some space. Especially considering how you are reacting in the library, is there somewhere else on campus that would give you the same quietness and space to work on your assignments? I know on my campus, it isn't unusual to see people working in the eating establishments on campus or outside on the lawn. Maybe a change to the routine or the scenary will make it easier to get out of your head focus on the assignments instead. Once you make some more progress with understanding these feelings that you have been expereincing, then you can push yourself to return to the library and overcome those fears.

I also wanted to share with you some tools my counselor has shared wih me when it comes to "freaking out" in public. This is mostly to calm a racing anxious mind or to relax my body when I am having a panic attack. He suggested I use grounding techniques such as the 5 senses exercises. When you are panicking, take in your surroundings and try to name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. The purpose is to bring you back to the present and distract you from whatever is causing you to panic in the first place. Another tool I recommend to people is to meditate. Practicing meditation has helped me a lot with my anxiety. I admit that I didn't feel the effects at first but the more it was implemented in my daily routine the faster I saw results. Meditation can be used to calm worried thoughts, regain concentration (for assignments), and have more restful sleep.

Lastly I wanted to applaud the work that you have already done for yourself. I'm proud that despite the hardships, you have pushed yourself to make progress already. Don't negate the progress by comparing it to end goal. Progress is progress and it should be celebrated with each step instead of waiting to celebrate your accomplishments until you reach the end. If you do wait to celebrate yourself, you run the risk of getting discouraged and giving up. So, from time to time try to take a moment to acknowledge the work you have done so far instead of always looking forward of what's next.

Since it has been a while since this was posted, I was wondering how you are doing? Have you found that maybe another strategy worked better for you instead? Are you still struggling with these anxious thoughts? I look forward to hearing from you.