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Awful roommate has given me anxiety...

User Profile: DecentPersona
DecentPersona February 25th, 2021

I found a room for rent online while searching for a new place this past summer. I was in a hurry because I had to move quickly, so didn't have time for the usual due diligence. Needless to say, I regret it. I knew there was something off the day I arrived, but let it slide thinking that it was just typical tension you'd expect amongst strangers. I quickly realized that my roommate has serious issues, exacerbated by alcoholism. If there is a problem, no matter how trivial, his tone will get progressively more hostile, even when sober. He also makes creepy comments about my daily habits and lifestyle, as if he is keeping a mental journal of things he can wield in an argument. He later admitted that he does this on purpose. He complains about me being in my room all the time, which should be no surprise seeing as he occupies the rest of the house and I don't want to be around him. We once went for a walk in the neighborhood and then sat down for a casual conversation, during which he eventually started to s*** all over me, in the guise of "being real". I told him he hadn't earned that right. Any time I push back he acts like he's smarter than me and he's analyzing me for my own benefit. I find this hilarious, considering that I'm the only person in the house with a job or transportation. That aside, I was willing to give him the benefit of a doubt, because I know times are tough. But that all changed the day he looked me in the eyes and plainly said "What if I killed you?" during a tense discussion about mundane household business. I told him that wasn't funny and removed myself from the conversation. That isn't even the whole of it; He has since bragged about being in an affair with a married woman, admitted that he snorted his grandmother's ashes, grabbed a claw hammer and 'jokingly' threated to kill me and others when we were playing cards, among more things. I'm far from perfect, but my faults pale in comparison to his. Recently, I finally had enough and called him out after he complained about me raising the thermostat by literally one degree. I told him that if the heating bill is too expensive then he should probably get a job. After every episode, he will eventually apologize and things will be okay for a week or two, then the cycle repeats. He has given me anxiety. I feel like I'm on that rope bridge from Temple of Doom, where no matter which direction I go I'm f*****. I often don't want to come out of my room unless I have to, and when I do I put on layers of clothing as if it's armor and pace in front of the door like I'm about to walk through a minefield. I wonder often what kind of mood he's in and worry if I did something to piss him off. I liken it to what it must be like in an abusive relationship. I am not afraid of him physically, but I don't want to antagonize him due to his unpredictable behavior. I can't find peace living with someone I don't trust. I try to put myself in his shoes and understand that he is struggling and times have been tough for a lot of people. But at his age he should have his s*** together and I'm running out of sympathy. Recent times have exposed a lot of people that can't handle adversity, and those people end up becoming someone else's adversity. Finally, after six months of near constant stress, I got a message from a friend saying that they will have a room available in a month. I was so relieved I almost cried. The next day he asked me if I planned to re-sign the lease, to which I said I would let him know. I told the landlord I wanted out and she agreed to let me stay an extra month. She then told my roommate and he got upset, acting like I was stringing him along. He then tells me I have a month to leave, to which I could only laugh. "Anything else?" I asked, and he told me I was a terrible roommate. I didn't get offended, I just said "cool" and walked away. I pity him and his delusions. He then proceeded to blast loud music in his room, which he never did before. He also turned on an electric organ in the living room and put something heavy on the keys so it would whine. Petty, passive-aggresive moves from a 43 year old 'man'. I tried to ignore it, but I was paranoid that he would mess with my food or my car or plot to steal something, or worse. I sat on my bed in darkness and stared at the door for an hour, visualizing the worst he could do to me... One more month and the nightmare will be over. Then I can finally breathe, finally sleep. Even so, I hope he gets his life together so that no one else has to go through this.

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User Profile: DecentPersona
DecentPersona OP February 25th, 2021

Sorry about the lack of spacing. Not sure why it did that. Also not sure if I can edit it.

User Profile: MonkeyMind82
MonkeyMind82 February 25th, 2021

Run! Anyway possible to move out? Temporary with a family and look elsewhere.

User Profile: MonkeyMind82
MonkeyMind82 February 25th, 2021

I jump the gun and didnt finish reading. Im glad u are out in a month. Quite honestly i dont think i woupd be able to stay there a month specially when he said what if i killed you? Like who the fk says that...jesus. he is clearly mental n i hope u are out safely lock your bedroom or sleep by thr door lol i dont play shoot!

User Profile: Jem7Cups
Jem7Cups February 26th, 2021

Move out immediately! That's not a safe environment to be in 🥺🥺🥺

User Profile: Emily0258
Emily0258 February 26th, 2021

Move out ASAP. It's not a good space for yousad

User Profile: indigoJp
indigoJp February 27th, 2021

Shouldn’t you let the landlord know what happened?