Hi
Hey everyone. I do not have anxiety but my boyfriend does. I've never dealt with it before and am trying to understand. He sees someone and gets medicine but there are days that are really hard and meeting my family is almost impossible for him. Any help would be appreciated. I'm wondering if maybe there is something I can do or things that we can do together to help him thru it because I know I don't know what it feels like and sometimes I feel so helpless. Tia :)
@versatileJet579 Hi there, thanks so much for your post! I give you major props for attempting to understand what your boyfriend is going through. Sometimes, we often forget that those around us can also be impacted by the personal struggles we have. I am glad that he is getting help. I can imagine how stressful it must be for you both. Have you tried to talk with him about what he is experiencing and how he copes with the anxiety? Sometimes, people just need someone to hear them out and offer support even without advice.
Feel free to check out the resources section here for coping with anxiety. If you ever need someone to chat with, feel free to reach out to the listeners here. I wish you and your boyfriend the best!
@versatileJet579
Maybe he has social anxiety since is hard for him to be with your family. He might think your family members have expectations in conversations or overal expectations about him, so he might panic a bit.
Well overal I'll say anxiety is hell to live with. If he takes medication I imagine is somehow serious. With anxiety we're constantly second guessing ourselves and daily tasks that are supposed to be easy (like pay for something, talk to people, go out, try something new, etc) become draining and hard to complete.
The best way I could describe anxiety is fear. The person might not even know what they're scared of , usually is subconscious. Is why is important to treat it. To expose those thoughts and fight against them.
I will say though the n 1 thing an anxious person needs is support and is admirable you're so loving and supportive to him. Trust me that does wonders. He's a very lucky guy to have you around. just keep supporting him and also if you can ask him how he feels, if can explain in his own words what he's anxious about, etc. Maybe him talking about it without any fears might help.
best of luck!
Thanks for the feedback and kind words. It definitely is a challenge and I've tried talking to him about it many times. He always says he doesn't know what causes it and it feels like fear or being really scared. I just wish I there was something more I could do or say to make him not feel this way and to help him realize there's nothing to be afraid of. I've read up about different techniques to help calm people from attacks but is there anything you could recommend that works better then the others? Thank you for your help :)
@Booklover95
@versatileJet579
Sure I have some tips for anxiety/panic attacks:
1- try to avoid touching. In this type of attack we're in defensive mode and touch really throw us off. If you want to try hugging him or something, please ask him in a very calm tone of voice if that's ok first.
2- try to keep a water bottle around. Sipping water slowly after an attack helps because hydration is needed and also helps with anxiety.
3- not sure if he already does this, if not try to make him do breathing exercises. There are many types of them, you can quickly search them on youtube. The more he practices the more air his brain will get and naturally relax. Because in these attacks people usually hyperventilate and can be dangerous.
4-try motivating him to go on walks. Walking and any other type of exercise helps ALOT in anxiety. Sometimes anxiety is built so is needed to just get rid of it by having our body moving.
5-meditation. Again, many types of meditation so he can use what he feels that is best. To me what works the best is repeating mantras (for example "I'm ok. I will be ok. I'm not alone." and so on).
6-certain types of tea and scents really help aswell. You can usually purchase these for a very cheap price and makes your house smell amazing.
At the moment these are the only ones I can remember but I believe they'll help him out.
Also don't worry. Is very hard to understand why anxiety happens but since he has professional help and your support, he'll for sure understand why in the near future :)
