I can't logic it away today.

I woke up and felt like I wanted to get things done, went to start and got a text from my grandfather letting me know he was forwarding some mail I'd gotten to their address and my chest got so tight I had to lay down to breath. Calmed down, started working again, ex texted me and I started feeling like if I didn't sit down I'd choke. So I gave up on chores and tried playing a game. Roomie came in to give me something that didn't fit her and she thought I'd like and my head started pounding so hard I had trouble seeing so I tried going back to chores. She came in again to ask permission to do house chores? I got confused, said she didnt need permission to do chores it's her house too, and she left again. Took me 15 minutes to feel safe getting back on task.

She opened the door again to borrow the vacuum and I felt like I was about to get thrown out a window if she caught what I was doing, which is stupid and insane... But I held real still until she took the vacuum and left. Now I'm laying in my hammock trying to calm down and every time I hear voices, footsteps or just... evidence someone else is in the house I panic all over again. I need to eat but the idea of leaving my room and seeing someone makes me want to puke...

I usually get through this by finding the root cause and using logic to combat it until I can be productive enough to lose myself to a task but I just can't find the thread today.