I don't feel like myself sometimes

My husband and i used to have a toxic relationship coz we entered into marriage with our own biological kids and we used to always fight coz we sided with our own kids. It's not a problem anymore coz we are much closer now and the kids are great but my husband and I still have resentment towards each other up until now. everytime we fight, he always brings up the past to hurt my feelings. I can't be myself around coz i feel he is always watching everything i do and i feel like he always waiting for me to make a mistake. when are fighting he also keeps comparing me to other moms which is really messed up coz he is doing it to hurt my feelings. i don't know how i feel towards him sometimes. I love him but i feel like he is so toxic. i feel like he doesn't completely support me and he is my number 1 basher. it's so sad to read what i wrote but this is how i feel towards him at the moment.