Lost for words
I try to put into words how I, hoping that maybe someone can understand what I'm going through or can help me. The only word that I seem to come up with is lost. I feel more than that; empty, hopeless, a burden, useless, alone, but lost if the first word that pops into my head. Most of the problem is that I don't know why I am feeling like this, and that makes me upset and gives me more anxiety. I hate myself most of the time because I feel like I'm a burden on my family and with my boyfriend. I want an escape I want to stop feeling the hate and emptiness but I don't know how. I just want it all to stop, to feel better and be the person I used to be,
@Bluegiraffe0122 what you are feeling is so common with anxiety sufferers! Of course you dont want to feel this way and lean on people so much, no one wants to feel like they are burden on others, but look at it this way, if they didnt want to be there for you they wouldnt be, they love you and honour so much they are there to help you and support you through this time of anxiety and uncertainty, my advice is to research ways to work yourself out of the anxiety, it can be done, people all the time work back into society and get back up after anxity has knocked them out for a while. You can choose to accept it or work on fixing it and that would be an amazing thing for your family and partner to see it would be like a thank you to them for all their hard work, they sound like they are behind you 100% Be kind to yourself, you are doing great! You are doing what you can day by day and this situation needs healing, its ok to take time here to heal.
@Bluegiraffe0122
It sounds like what you're experiencing may have been happening long enough for it to have turned into depression on a clinical scale. If it's lasting more than a few weeks and you can't pinpoint something within your control external that would improve things I suggest seeing a doctor if that's a viable option. In the meantime listening to mindfulness audio on the path menu may help to ease some of your anxiety. <3
Also I've been there. You're not alone in that feeling.