are they judging me?
my best friend invited me to hang out with him (and I think some of his two other friends) at a park to eat food and chill for his birthday in a couple of days (while being completely safe ofc). at first I was happy that I got invited. then my mind started to go into overthinking mood. I started to remember the last time I hung out with him and his friends and I kept on overthinking if his friends were judging me, if they talked bad about me, why did I even come, they probably hate me and that kept on happening a lot while I was with them (a couple months ago). and I started having those same thoughts. what if I mess up while I'm with them again and they do judge me or find me annoying or talk bad about me. I don't want to keep on overthinking this kind of stuff and make it worse, I just don't have a lot of places to put these kinds of thoughts.
@smolstrawberries Hey there! Overthinking is energy consuming. That paired with social activities is worse because you don't have much time to allow your brain to make sense what is going on when you're conversing with someone or hanging out with them. I understand how mentally draining it must have felt to constantly worry about how your best friend's friends might have felt during your conversations with them. I hope you take some time for yourself to understand that as concerning as these things are (coming from someone with social anxiety herself), maybe they didn't notice or they might have been busy socialising themselves, that to them it might have just looked like a casual conversation. I do commend you for taking the initiative and hanging out with people willingly; it's a really nice thing and it will for sure help you overcome your anxiety of what others might think of you as you find confidence in yourself along the way.
Sounds like you're feeling anxious about not meeting a perceived expectation with your peers. You think they will not accept you or judge you in some negative way. I feel the same way every time I sign up for something on meetup.com. How will I be perceived? You know what though? You're absolutely right! They could be narrow minded, judgemental types! But I think the better perspective to take is who cares?! They could be a 100 different ways, It's not up to you to fit their needs. Keep it simple. You're going to meet your friends to enjoy some food and conversation. Don't create any expectations beyond that.