Dissociation/depersonalization?
Hi all,
I don't know that much about these terms: dissociation or depersonalization but I think I'm experiencing something like that? Usually during in-person one-on-one convos especially dates or when going out.
From the outside, I probably just seem quiet/not saying much, but for me, the physical symptoms of SA are so intense especially the muscle tension which in fact makes me feel physically immobile (heart rate, nausea, shallow breathing , etc.) that I can barely talk (like my mouth is broken/stuck together) and start to daydream that I was somewhere else, almost so my mind can be "safe" if I pretend I'm not there but watching from above or something. At the same time, I want so much to share my deep feelings so I can be close to others, so I feel incredibly lonely afterwards and frustrated that I won't be able to feel close to anyone.
Anyone else experience this?
Thanks,
Day
@Daydreamer47 Do you feel like you're in a movie? That your life is a movie and everything is just sort of fake? Do you have memory loss at times? Do you act without being fully conscious? These are some things that are experienced with dissociation. You said SA which I assume means sexual abuse. Victims of SA can experience dissociation or what can also be called depersonalization.
@Versatchy Hi there. No SA is social anxiety. What you described sounds different from what I experience, so maybe dissociation is the wrong term. I am mainly talking about feeling so nervous around other people that I withdraw into my head.
@Daydreamer47 It could be a severe form of anxiety. When it deals with memory loss/being absent minded almost 100% of the time that's when dissociation can be defined.
@Daydreamer47 I sometimes experience dissociation during times of intense anxiety. What you're experiencing doesn't really sound like dissociation but I could be wrong. I experience what @Versatchy describes. Regardless, I'm sorry you're feeling this way and having trouble connecting to others due to the social anxiety. You can always chat to someone on 7 Cups. Perhaps you can work on some small achievable goals for overcoming your social anxiety.
@Daydreamer47 What you're describing is a panic attack and it is common among people with social anxiety. When you are experiencing this, the best way to calm down would be to use the grounding method.
Grounding is when you concentrate on your surroundings and focus on things using your senses. It usually follows a numerical order of 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Find 5 things to look at, 4 things to hear, 3 things to feel (like textures), 2 things to smell, 1 thing to taste.
One thing that will also help is to focus on your breathing and try to breathe slowly to calm your heart rate.
I must advise you not to run away or fear these situations, as it will make your anxiety and panic attacks worse in the long run. Try your best to overcome your fears. I know how difficult it is as first. I'm in the same boat as you are.
Good luck 