Hello
My name is Jillian, I've been suffering from severe anxiety since I was 13 years old. I've never taken any kind of medication, I have gone to therapy after I had a time where I wouldn't leave my bedroom for weeks at a time. That helped and let me branch out into freedom and life. But after a recent break up with my ex fiance of 9 years (who I was going to marry the next year) it's thrown me into this massive panic that I'm broken now and I'll just ruin everything again. He was trying to convince me I was crazy when I'd confront him on trying to leave me for another girl, when in fact he was. He told me I was making up things in my head and that wasn't fair to him. They were all true.
My now boyfriend has told me that I am the one for him. He wants to be with me forever. I feel the same but worry that I'll screw everything up. Every day I talk myself out of panic attacks, I draw some positivity quote and share it on Facebook to help boost moral. Some days are harder than others.
Indeed Jillian, some days are truly harder than the others and those days are the reason that make us realize we're still worth it. It is who we are and how much we can carry on our shoulders. You are a very strong person and very kind after all you have been through! It takes just a little to have faith in yourself. Also, as a piece of advice if I may, communication is the best way to have a healthy relationship. When you're having these 'what ifs' scenarios in your mind about whether you're not good enough in this relationship, try to talk about them with your boyfriend. That is why you're together, to solve things and help each other with love.