Joined fbook group and regret it
I joined a fbook group for helping to raise black and mixed black children in a "healthy" and "supportive" way...
I made a post about issues I have been having with my black spouse having self hatred and it being negative for our daughter... and wanted input... guidance... and maybe friendship.
I have no friends or family that can give input on this.
I have no money.
I ended the post that I apologize for how I type because I am autistic.
...
Oh my... the responses? Almost all of 78 messages were so hateful... I can't even...
"We don't need your diagnosis - autistic has nothing to do with this."
Some said very aggressively to me.
I think human interactions and trying to navigate cultural issues... is something me being autistic has a lot to do with ._.
"Wasting our time."
"Troll"
"Clickbait"
Makes no sense because private group.
"Poster has only 3 friends and 6k posts that means they have to be a troll."
Rubbing in my face I have few friends hurts. A lot of autistic people have that problem.
The 6k posts are PRIVATE and mostly autistic memes or art I posted to MYSELF.
"Poster has on their profile a link to their Etsy website so just trying to get sales..."
It is my artwork... I haven't had a sale in 5 years... and I don't care if people buy my art or not... I am still going to make it and might as well try to sell it if I spend so much time making it.
I didn't ask this group for money or to look at my page.
Others basically scream-typed at me for not immediately divorcing my spouse for their internalized racism...
As if I should just know all these things? As if I came equipped knowing what they think I should know is that therapy will not help my spouse...
How am I supposed to know things have gone to far or my spouse has hurt too much if I have no input from anyone else with a perspective that is similar? Id est black or mixed family issues.
I tried a domestic violence shelter but it wasn't safe for me and my toddler at all. And everything was on waiting list for 3+ years because I live near a big city.
The only kind ones were like "Yeah your spouse probably won't get better for years if ever so you need to divorce to protect your child doesn't get the same issues. And get black friends."
The place I thought I could- most poured their pain on me.
Because I am pale skinned mixed person I wasn't allowed to say anything... even though my toddler isn't old enough to speak for herself.
And I want my toddler to be proud of everything she is and want to know about all her cultures.
But it looks like my toddler will have enemies on every side like me too.
I understand their hurt and suspicion. But seriously only three people tried to genuinely talk to me.
And I am fairly certain it is not an okay thing to be like "Hey would you be my friend because your black and proud and I want my daughter to not be ashamed of being mixed black?"
How well would that seriously go over with neurotypicals?
When they lie so much it is like breathing to them? And they assume that of everyone else?
The moderators let me in the private group after a long screaning process... and the moderators didn't remove my post when others demanded it because the moderators at least knew I was for real... but they stayed silent with people insulting me nonstop.
I don't see the point of wasting a lot of time trying to convince people I am genuine just to get real advice...
Just ignore the haters?
Who hate me because I communicate differently? Exhausting.
But I got so much hatred poured on me I almost cried all day.
As if I did horrible things to my daughter and them.
Still hurts.
@ShatteredNow
This was a horrible, judgemental and quite disrespectful group.
I'm sorry you went through this.
Cups is the opposite.
Kind.
Caring.
Open.
And a safe space 💙🤗

Wow. That is so totally out of line. I'm sorry that happened to you. I think, likely, you hit on a raw nerve for a lot of people, and in doing so, because fb has members and false profiles from anywhere, even in a moderated group, because these people can be anonymous to an extent, they projected on you. Unfortunately, as much as I wish it weren't the case, many people, most perhaps, from any race, are likely not to be very educated about autism. It's a 'hot-button topic,' and so is family, and so is race. There's a lot of deep work and issues the world over being churned with all of that right now. It was good, and brave of you, to seek support. I'm sorry that call was not answered, and that you were treated as a mirror. Please be kind to yourself and feel free to remove yourself from any environment or group that you feel does not have your highest good in mind. That's just my advice/opinion. Thanks for sharing. ❤️