Might have autism, makes me anxious
Hello,
A while ago I read an in-depth article about autism, and after looking more and more into it I realised I might be autistic.
This made me depressed because looking through my life this gives a hugely different perspective in most of my memories. A group I am part of, now I question if I was ever really part of it...
Most things feel corrupted and fake somehow - apart from a few things I still enjoy from time to time, if ever I have the energy for them.
I felt very lonely in the last few months, and I don't have reliable friends to turn to (I have one friend, but she's struggling too, and cancels 6 out of 10 meetups we agree on, because of tiredness, anxiety etc.). I tried carefully bringing up the topic with my family, but they have no ability whatsoever to understand these struggles and give emotional support - in fact they were never able to.
Where I live, the waitlist for a diagnosis is over a year long, and I don't know how to manage that much time with these thoughts.
I think I just need some sincere connections and hugs...
Hugs! 🤗
You are not alone. We are here and there are lots of resources available that don’t require a diagnosis.
I spent a lot of time in the denial stage but when I did believe that I was autistic, I did the exact same thing: review everything major interactions and relationships. At times I came away feeling like I had gone into situations with no possibility of success. Relationships that I questioned were deep and long running. How many times had I easily been manipulated? How many friends were real?
Answer: all of your friendships were and are real because they were real and fulfilling at the time.
it doesn’t matter what their view of the relationship was. You will never know for sure.
What is important is that you can continue and create new relationships going forward armed with additional information about yourself.
What is important is now you know you have common ground with an identifiable group. We will understand.
We are here for you. You need hugs????
🤗 🤗 🤗
we will listen. We are here.
~Z
You are not alone in your feelings. I am going through similar things and this is why I tried this. I do have a councilor and working through it.