Bipolar Diagnosis
I got discharged from the mental hospital about 2 weeks ago. I was there for having a suicide plan. When I saw my therapist, she said I’m bipolar. She said I’m in a manic episode. I didn’t want to believe it, but now I’m coming down and I do. And I hate it. Why can’t I just be okay for once? I felt the best I have in years, and your telling me it’s just another disorder?? I thought I was better. I really believed I was. I felt like I MATTERED. I was productive and energetic and happy. But it was all a lie. It was stupid. I know it needs to be under control and mania can be dangerous and blah blah blah. But I want to go back. I want to feel that way again. I was on top of the world. I need that. I’ve been depressed as long as I can remember. But the mania… it was like my eyes were open for the first time. The world was bright and clear and filled with hope. Now I’m just exhausted and angry. I’m angry I can’t be better. I’m angry that I’ll never be more than a pile of disorders.
@jb3ar25
Same here bud.
I am bipolar 1 and have been through the wringer. 2% of the world gets this, so we're just unlucky. I'm trying to make the best of my situation but it's miserable.
Lmk if you have any questions, I have had the diagnosis for about 6 years.
It really sucks tbh. I definitely get the part about being unlucky :/
On the other hand, I do have a great support system and am trying to stay positive through everything.
Thank you for the offer, I am trying to learn everything I can. I get kinda obsessive sometimes😮💨
Listen, you are more than your illness. Even if it is bipolar disorder, you are more than your illness. Look Mania can be a positive experience but again with mania you harm other people emotionally and mentally so you need to be careful though. But you are always more than your illness. Believe me.
I’m trying to stay positive through this. I know I’m more than my disorders, but it feels like they’re taking over my life. My psychiatrist is changing my meds so I can be more stable, which I hope helps. Thank you for your kind words❤️
@jb3ar25 That's tough man. There really is no easy way to find out. My doctor had hinted that I was BP but I always denied it. That was as a teen. Now as an adult, I definitely know I'm BP. I wish I listened to my doctor sooner.
my therapist has said for a while she thought I was, but with recent events it became very real for me. I wish I wasn’t in denial for so long
You are not a disorder/ a disorder does not define you. I am so sorry you are struggling. Sending hugs