Had to make a really hard decision

Well I was all set to start college in January. Had it funded. Orientation next week. But my mental health with my bipolar and BPD have been off. Started in May. Things got real ugly in the past 2 months after things were starting to look better. In my 16 years of living with bipolar it decided to pull some surprises. It has been really effecting me physically too. Yesterday my psychiatrist said I should put off my start date for school until August. The fall semester. It took 24 hours of denial to agree. And Mom agrees. I was really looking forward to it. Bipolar is why I had to leave college the first time. I put together a list of why putting it off is a good thing. And what I can do with that opened up time. Things to get better. Better prepare. He's right. I'm in no shape and there's a lot of treatment to do to get me back to a good state. Maybe I knew but denied it to myself. Now I just need to send an email to the right person at the college. I know they will understand. It's just bipolar reminding me that when it wants it can mess things up even though I feel I have the control. I know there's some control I have but there are things I can't control. I just need to accept that there are in fact certain limitations. But the more I identify and understand them I can develop a better plan to deal with them. People don't get that it's not just a mental condition but very physical too. You can't control the chemical imbalance in the brain. Science knows so much but so little at the same time. Well, now I need to come up with the best way to put that email. And find a way to cope with the horrible depressed feeling this decision has caused.